kara’s walk home – bad feelings ;^( كلمات اغاني
lie down in the woods where you cried for the first time
reading something you could love
for the rest of your life as you leaf through the pages
and lie down in the bed where you stared at the ceiling
wondering if you believed in god
wondering how to perceive the world now without them
dig through the boxes of the books that you left with
your parents and you’ll read
through lines you underlined and the words in the margins
and walk around in the city where you lived for the first time
on your own and you’ll p-ss
familiar places that aren’t yours anymore
and i don’t want to feel this way but
i’m jealous every time you say that
“this whole thing has changed my life”
but i never had that kind of moment in my life
and i’m waking up in the same place each day
and i’ll roll right out, look for some socks and shorts
and forget it soon enough
faint smells, dirt and moisture
playing soccer, or catch
i’m sitting in the front yard
waiting for the world to open up
paint smells, sight, and textures
oily gl-ss from my nose
i’m standing in the back yard
waiting for the world to open up
i feel dead when i see someone get the job they hoped for
and i know i wanna be
happy for them but it just k!lls me
and rachel says she feels the same when
people talk about their families, feeling comfortable at home
so i guess i don’t have it that bad
spend my life waiting for some email that will
change my life for the better
go somewhere that will lift me up and
over the hurdles placed in front of me
i go outside, see the same streets that they do
squint from the sun like everyone else
the sun doesn’t care at all
and i’ve got work but i’ll stay up as late as i can
morning still comes and i’m still alive
just barely and i can’t wait to go home
“comparison will k!ll you!” some business man says as he talks on his phone waiting for the 3 million donuts he ordered for him and his business meetings that he has every thursday. i’ve only been working here for 4 months but i’ve already memorized their patterns
sandy doesn’t want to see anyone smile today. her coworkers tell her about signing up for cl-sses that she can’t even think about anymore; it’s been so long since she gave up paying her student loans but every once in a while she throws in $20 just for fun
and janice pulls out an old diary and reads about how angry she was that her father made them stay an extra week in new hampshire in summer, 2003. she didn’t want to look at the stars but to just go home, she said. tonight she’ll stay up late reading wikipedia entries about shenmue and she won’t regret it
it’s better to stay awake until i’m dead tired than to be well rested and spend all night staring at the ceiling, and besides, it’s the only free time i have. the only thing i hate is waking up in the morning but at least i know that we’re still breathing
and i’ve been thinking, it’s not too foolish
my heart moves slowly, my legs move slowly
and i’ve been thinking, it’s not too foolish
my heart moves slowly, my legs move slowly
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