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dave malloy – fedallah كلمات اغاني

[fedallah, spoken]

yeah i reckon you’re right

reckon i’m the devil himself, not a man. god forbid, oh law forbid i be a real man, an actual fully_fleshed_out character. no! instead i just get a… what the f_ck even is this thing? f_cking mystic bullsh_t. ugh!

cut the waves!

so yes, fedallah is here… and he’s weird

hermie, he’s f_ckin’ weird

so, we gonna dig in a little [?]. now, a lotta people get confused and think fedallah is muslim or some kinda exotic, far_eastern mystic because of his rumpled chinese jacket. but fedallah is in fact, parsi. now the parsi are a group of zoroatrian monotheistic religious sect based on the eternal dualistic struggle between good and evil. and we’re living in persia building fire temples, leaving our dead to be eaten by birds, all kinds of cool sh_t (you can wikipedia this). until the 9th century when the arab conquest hits and suddenly arab muslims are burning our streets, k!lling our priests, and all that sh_t and it turns out history’s f_cked up everything

though america, special kind of f_cked up

now i know, you think, the middle eastern charcter would be muslim, right? i mean we’ve got all the most persecuted groups from america’s long and f_cked_up history up in here! and uh_ muslims have had a real f_ckin time in the last couple of decades in america am i right? an— i mean, no offense guys, solidarity, obviously, since i’m black. which is real f_ckin color_conscious casting i mean, did you all get that the mates are all actually white dudes? uh huh, they snuck that into some lyrics but that went by pretty quick. oh i’m sure our beloved writer and director have thought painstakingly about all this aggressively diverse casting. in effort to_to what, guys? win some prizes? “outstanding woke_ness from a white writer and director in a musical”

no no no, we’re good, guys. aight, i appreciate the paycheck. really do

uh, but what’s really f_cked up about this is that i am_ now i mean actor me_ was, in fact, raised muslim! so i actually know that sh_t. i got a rug, you know? but then, like a lot of people, i went to college. started reading some books, thinking for myself, smoking weed and sh_t, and i came to the realization that islam, christianity, judaism, hinduism, every f_ckin’ ‘ism’ thing else, are all bazonkers! i mean people are f_ckin’ cuttin off their babies’ pr_ck_skins and doin’ conversion therapy on g_ys and stonin’ untouchables and hidin’ their women and i mean, no f_ckin way. i hit my atheist phase hard and i never looked back

and no one got a pass, neither of the ancient wicken [?] worship or new_age astrology sh_t either. i mean sh_t. messes. people. up!

i mean look at old quaker_gone_crackers ahab, [?] fool it’s just a whale! oh, sorry, spoiler for part four. part four?! jesus f_cking dave malloy! where’s ishmael? oh, when you see him, watch out for him, aight don’t take any sh_t from him. we the ones up here bustin’ our ass [?] sh_t, not him. though, you know, for all of part one while all these guys out here singin’ and dancin’ and i’m just hangin out backstage doing jack sh_t. and i’m getting paid the same as them. thank you, equity!

ugh, anyway. f_ck religion, f_ck america, f_ck y’all

i mean, to be honest, to be really honest
part of me does really wanna see everything burn. to watch it sink to the bottom of the sea, give the whales, dolphins, c_ckroaches, and mushrooms a chance, you know? let mankind just be done. annihilate. ocean

but alright! alright, i can see our main characters and our playwright and our director, god bless ‘em, gettin’ antsy, so let’s head back into the so_called “rising action”! i guess they got a sort of a cooking show vaudeville coming up next. i dunno, should be fun. i’ll just try to sit back and be vaguely menacing

just like you like me, right hermie?! right hermie?!

- dave malloy

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