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yaboiwolf - don't wanna be alive lyrics

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[verse 1]
spent too many years of all my life on tryin’ to right my wrong
i look into the mirror, i see designs and think of writing songs

but growing up, i think that i can really see it
it’s a cruel, cruel word, so i get why you would leave it
and i may have been naivе to think you wouldn’t really mean it
but i guess i’d act dumb, ‘causе i didn’t wan’ believe it

this sh_t is tough
don’t really talk about my feelings
’cause there really ain’t enough
for it to have some sort of meaning

some days, i be feeling hopeful, like i’m going good in life
but i think that i’m just coping from the pain i have inside

[chorus]

[verse 2]
throwing out more jokes, just to make myself feel better
tell ’em that it really works, but deep down, i’m feeling lesser
i’ve been grinding all my life, i won’t falter under pressure
it’s a f_cking endless cycle of this pain and d_mn displeasure

i’ve come to terms with it, this sh_t won’t ever end

i wanna set myself free from this h_ll i’m living in
i’ve worked too d_mn hard, i ain’t ever giving in

well, at least i tell myself that, every single f_cking time
and that every single time
it’ll all be going fine (uh)

look, i know that i’ve got enemies
i’m sorry that you’re hating me
i know i’m also blaming me
the switch ups, it amazes me

there’s nothing i can do, i just wanna feel
ain’t talking things i plan to do, ain’t ever gonna heal

[chorus]
i don’t think there are remedies
for aching hearts and memories
fighting things that n0body sees
i turn that sh_t to melodies (oh_oh)
i guess i do it just to put my mind at ease (put my mind at ease)
i’ve been trying, trying to survive
i’ve been lying, lying, ’cause i don’t wanna be alive

’cause i don’t think there are remedies
for aching hearts and memories
fighting things that n0body sees
i turn that sh_t to melodies (oh_oh)
i guess i do it just to put my mind at ease (put my mind at ease)
i’ve been trying, trying to survive
i’ve been lying, lying, ’cause i don’t wanna be alive

[outro]
to all the peeps who hated me, please know i’d hate me too
i tried my best to change it, i didn’t win i knew

- yaboiwolf lyrics

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