vulning - like the leaves كلمات الأغنية
watching you die, separated by glass
every second passed
every day died in the silence and nothing was left
nothing was left
hearing you weep for the sunlight
never more to rest
perched like morning dew and shining on your skin
nothing was left
you were only a child
when you found your mother dying
i don’t know how you could have survived
without being obliterated in the light
but i suppose you were stronger than i
but neither of us ever said goodbye
look me in the eyes and tell me honestly, can you promise me
that they knew we loved them?
i would set fire to every world
and rip from the sky every star
if it meant i could tell you
if it meant i could save you
i would poison every ocean
and reduce to ashes every forest
if it meant i could tell you
just how much i loved you
they will sharpen that pause to a knife
cutting open your cloven age lines
every black tongued birthmark carved
from it’s parasitic place in your eyes
like something that never happened
like an indescribable absence
that was and wasn’t and never was
like a sleep that never comes
i would set fire to every world
and rip from the sky every star
if it meant i could tell you
if it meant i could save you
i would poison every ocean
and reduce to ashes every forest
if it meant i could tell you
just how much i loved you
we are experiments
sent to the edge of the human experience
we feed on the precipice
we feed on impermanence
memorized pain
what lines, in sand, remain?
lines of blood and water
and a fate line in it’s unmaking
with our feet in the soil
in the fields of ḥaqel ‘addam
where beckon us hanging trees
calling on alms and rosaries
vestigial burials creep
turning about on their hooves
reticent lessons and laws
mimicking all that is lost
and she’s been sleeping 13 years
and never once alone
cause every time she shuts her eyes
she thinks of all the days they took from him
and every little crease along the sheets
creates a grave, a place a body’s meant to be
and every frame is empty on the walls
in that house that is a carcass of a family
and i am sick with the glass eyed knowledge
that i will be at war with my body for the rest of my life
and the sympathetic truth i am most scared to face
is that i will survive
we are blighted like the leaves, buried in the shadow of intransitive love
withering silently, sick with our silver prosthetic
awaiting our coagulate funeral, dust to the earth as it was
and the spirit will return to the gods who gave it
i would set fire to every world
and rip from the sky every star
if it meant i could tell you
if it meant i could save you
i would poison every ocean
and reduce to ashes every forest
if it meant i could tell you
just how much i loved you
there is something on the outside
there is something on the outside
there is something on the outside
there is somewhere on the outside
there is somewhere on the outside
where you will be waiting for me
and i will be haunted
by every day that i could have been kinder
there is somewhere on the outside
a garden that will always be autumn
and you are there, waiting to see me
i can’t wait to see you again
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