upgrade hiphop - further down the rabbit hole كلمات الأغنية
drown my sorrow in a gl-ss bottle, out of luck, better odds if i scratch lotto
the pain grows and the raps follow, my flask hollow, try to make the best of it f-ck a motto
seems we couldn’t catch a break a piece of puzzles missing
battling depression while my brother battles drug addiction
best friend’s my therapist my mother’s wearing thin
the pen is gripped but ever since this endless stress i vent for bliss
head is gone like severed limbs this medicine ain’t helping sh-t
instead i rip this thinning hair and shed away from weathered skin
entering the darkest place i’ve ever been and set up tent
made this place my home equipped with alcohol and sedatives
lost relationships no longer close with friends or relatives
‘cause talking about the h-ll i live and made me close the sh-ll i’m in
a heartless boss with faker grins than artificial gelatin
they said i quit, i said i’m sick, a simple sh-t they’d never give
doctor’s notes eligible? they don’t believe i’m checking in?
they caught me out performing with a twitter pic for evidence
…first off you think i’m dumb enough to hide it?
b-tch i posted on a public site, my name ain’t even private
the acupuncture, therapy, hypnosis, change of meds
biggest contest of my life and i’m supposed to take a rest?
i couldn’t drive in case of panic mom would drive the car to watch
embarr-ssed that i needed her i told her stay in parking lot…
my heart would knock louder as it filled with pain
xanny-bars were wearing off the second that i hit the stage
fight or flight, time is now, luckily i made it through
and leaving with that winning spot’s exactly what i came to do
the dust settles and the hype wears thin
got to cross another win, on this long check list
not a bong gets ripped, no alcohol gets sipped
i got home and started working on this song that’s it
i feel the storm is frequent, there’s nothing left to do
depressed in every season, the curtains set the mood
the mirror broke to pieces, reflection never knew
i’m an aborted fetus, lost in this vestibule
but i guess they’ll never know where i came from, since i never left my room
and i guess they’ll never know why my guard’s up, since i never let them through
weerd science:
we go further down the rabbit hole
wipe away the cobwebs and we survey the catacombs
and when the “never yawns” meet up with the “not alone’s”
the shadows you cannot atone
we all come from hollowed homes
when every breath is a baritone
and every heart beat is an 808
that vibrates and rattles on
carrying on a tradition
a modern citizen
though i’m marred in cynicism
and yes the medicine is addictive
leaving you clinically submissive
but you p-ssively dismiss it
let it diminish….
your body and what heart that you had left in it
you’re on the fast track to your last track
and though you focus on your front
your hands reach for your stabbed back
and then you stab back
i’m sick of asking god questions…’cause you know what?
he never once answered back
a piece of sh-t a sad sack
in a whole city of mad men that’ll split you down the middle like an -ss crack
i don’t discriminate, like a f-cking bad batch
of dope across state lines
my whole life is an appalling act
so act appalled, and every track you put your accent on
when you wave your white flag cause you’re soft like mattress foam
you’re in the battle zone
it’s dangerous to act alone
so act accordingly
according to me you’re on a ride along
you do not belong on songs of sickness
where the docs can’t diagnose
and the meds don’t fix sh-t
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