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tom dark - the yum yum tree lyrics
there grew a tree where i was born in my own neighborhood
and ev’ryone for miles agreed that tree was mighty good
it bore a fruit so firm and sweet, it made all tonsils glad
digesting it was so much fun, it drove our tummies mad
we smiled to think how nature could produce such goodies free
and nature smiled back at us through our own yum yum tree
the yum yum tree would show mankind how tasty life could be
it changed the lives of all who ever tried the yum yum tree
[spoken] 1: yum yum tree? that’s really stupid
[spoken] 2: sh sh shh, quiet. go ahead, bruce
a cladode chordate rutaceae with bifurcated leaves
deciduous, yet somehow dioecious, strange to see
and these digitate integuments on indehiscent seeds
and these mucronates keep epiphytes from causing tubercles
with these fancy words a botanist approved our yum yum tree
while dissecting it with sk!ll and care on pbs tv
then he lectured on how nature’s earth produced such goodies free
and he sold some plans to squeeze it into high technology
[spoken] (muttering)
then industry improved yum yum, to better suit our will
with phiso-meso dna and hexachlorophyll
and phiso-mega-death-a-hol and stuff they use for pills
then airplanes sprayed our neighborhood and all our pets fell ill
then yum yum tankers sailed the seas and yum yum juice got spilled
then lab’ratory tests on rats showed yum yum juice could k!ll
with some chagrin they rubbed their chins at this duplicity
while nature smiled quietly inside that yum yum tree
[spoken] (mumbled)
[spoken] just… listen
one day a k!ller frost came, and the yum yum crop declined
and yum yum addicts ev’rywhere lost their collective mind
the crime rate rose as prices soared, no yum yum subst-tute
so all right-thinking paranoids declared war on yum yum fruit
the cia found communists behind this yum yum slime
religions found the devil, the fbi found crime
we had to move to rectify foul nature’s wicked deeds
straight to jail for anybody caught possessing yum yum seeds
then certain famous pressure groups did press the fcc
to have wiped clean from radio all songs of yum yum trees
the yum yum tree did show mankind how silly it can be
when it lays the blame for all its pain on something from a tree
and i guess i’m now a criminal, ’cause i found yum yum seeds
and i see nature smiling as i plant… them… quietly…
[spoken] 1: that was an ecological song
[spoken] 2: no, it was about man
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