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the warp zone (youtube) - recap raps-harry potter lyrics
[verse 1]
once upon a time, in 1991
lived a wizard named harry, whose dad and mum
were k!lled by he who must not be named
or voldemort for short, so harry hops on a train
off to hogwarts meets hermione and ron
the sorting hat sorts, then they get some quidditch on
a three headed dog, he guards the sorcerer’s stone
grants immortality to the person that owns it
harry and his friends put the dog to sleep
then fight a plant, play chess, avoid flying keys
locates quirrell, with a turban on his head
which is hiding voldemort, harry touches him, he’s dead
voldemort’s soul knocks harry out, then he’s gone
but harry is protected by a spell from his mom
which means voldemort can’t harm her only son
so i guess the story’s gonna go on and on
[verse 2]
year two starts with a warning from dobby
a letter stealing elf with the hopes of stopping
harry from returning, but he doesn’t follow orders
as they take a flying car from platform 9 3/4
then they crash in, get detention
a message in blood is written
“chamber of secrets has been opened…beware”
this only applies to enemies of the heir
and that is when the kids begin
to wonder who is slytherin
harry speaks snake, which confuses them a little
them he stumbles upon the diary of tom riddle
it seems tom riddle might have k!lled moaning myrtle
who’s the ghost of a bathroom, and ginny’s in the middle
of a ritual when, harry gets in
k!lls a basilisk to save future girlfriend
[verse 3]
harry potter’s a cl-ssic
tale of good and evil
do what is right not what is easy
unless you’re a lame muggle
[verse 4]
can you believe we’re already at year 3
harry blows up aunt marge eating with the dursleys
back to hogwarts he flees, on a knight bus, he leaves
now for some reason dumbledore looks different to me
sirius black has escaped as a prisoner of azkaban
as a bunch of dementors
fly around the place, make it dark and cold
while also sucking face and devouring souls
new defense against the dark arts: professor lupin
teaches the patronus charm, which a wizard can do when
a dementor causes harm
that’s when ron’s rat bites him
rat turns into peter, sirius and lupin fight him
peter pettigrew now faces certain doom
lupin turns into a werewolf ’cause of the moon
so the rat gets away, sirius is not ok
but they turn back time and save him in replay
[verse 5]
on to year 4 harry’s dreaming of a man
as the goblet of fire picks four champions
it should only be three, moody makes him compete
and the deadly tri-wizard tournament can begin
save your friend from drowning once you find an egg
and the trophy’s a portkey at the end of the maze
cedric and harry both go away
to a graveyard where peter pettigrew awaits
the spare gets k!lled, death eaters make it worse
voldemort gets blood to k!ll harry, but first
expelliarmus vs the k!lling curse
voldemort’s wand breaks, harry leaves with a burst
[verse 6]
i really can’t believe harry’s even still alive
gets expelled from hogwarts at the start of year 5
but the order of the phoenix help the ministry learn
that voldemort is already planning a return
new defense against the dark arts teacher seems smarmy
the kids make a secret group: dumbledore’s army
voldemort possesses harry, sirius dies
“neither can live while the other survives”
[verse 7]
these films kind of seem real dark now
does everyone just die in the end?
let’s not forget these movies were made as
entertainment for children
[verse 8]
in year 6, we learn about horcruxes
voldemort stored his soul in objects
like lockets and kids
dumbledore is no more, snape comes to draco’s defense
and admits that he is the half-blood prince
[verse 9]
polyjuice, year 7 potters now confuse the enemy
death eaters attack, and they take over the ministry
patronus in the form of a doe to a sword
risk their life, break the ice, get the sword of gryffindor
locket is destroyed, to the wilderness we go
to master death, you need the deathly hallows
resurrection stone to resurrect ghosts
elder wand, invisibility cloak
voldemort steals the wand from dumbledore’s grave
draco turns good and we learn that snape
has been helping all along because the love for harry’s mom
so harry must die so voldemort can go away
then he comes back to life, a bunch of death eaters die
harry overpowers voldemort, pieces to the sky
19 years later harry’s married and a father
that ends the saga of harry james potter
[outro]
lots of plots and characters
did not make it in this rhyme
but that’s what you get when
you recap eight films in three minutes time
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