the garages – arturo huerta and henry marshmallow كلمات اغاني
[intro: the seattle garages]
seattle garages
seattle garages
seattle garages
seattle garages
[verse 1: arturo huerta, _the garages_]
you want it i’ve got it
arturo in the pocket
batter’s worst nightmare _(seattle garages)_
arturo, arturo, arturo
chant my name though i might not be there _(seattle garages)_
can’t see me, can’t hear me, just a vague feeling
coming from the pitching square _(seattle garages)_
it’s arturo, arturo, huertas
arturo, arturo, huertas
we don’t have to play these gamеs _(seattle garages)_
you_oh won’t know who thrеw the ball til the ball is through the strike frame _(seattle garages)_
swing batter, swing batter, swing i dare you
you will never hit this fastball _(seattle garages)_
_arturo, arturo, huertas_
_arturo, arturo, huertas_
_(park here)_
[verse 2: henry marshmallow, _the mini_marshmallows_]
(_it looks easy_)
pitching a strike
and then pitching a strike
and then pitching again
but you believe me
(_i worked hard_)
shaping these marshmallow
muscles into a real
k!lling machine
have you seen die hard?
i’m like the blaseball john mcclane
til i’m dead, throwing curveb_lls cross the astral plane
yippie ki yay
(_i seem scary_)
but i’ve got a soft side
a marshmallow heart
made of sugary gold
for my teammates i’m
(_willing to_)
throw both these gelatin
hands, mess with them, you will
get knocked out cold
don’t you ever forget
the name’s henry marshmallow
the most beautiful man with a saccharine soul
don’t you ever forget
the name’s henry marshmallow
a true champion, with a hardened sugar mold
i made a song _
it’s henry marshmallow, the world’s greatest pitcher in all of blaseball!
it’s henry marshmallow, the world’s greatest pitcher in all of blaseball!
la la la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la
la la la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la
la la la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la
la la la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la
[piano instrumental]
these hands could
deliver baseb_lls
to thousands of catchers
and never meet a bat
that’s a new poem
i just wrote
it’s about pitching
i’m so good at pitching
i’m the mvm…
most valuable
marshmallow man in the league!
plus some humans think i’m a deity
i won’t argue with them
i think that i’m pretty rare
a sentient marshmallow with perfect hair
here’s my song again
it’s henry marshmallow, the world’s greatest pitcher in all of blaseball!
it’s henry marshmallow, the world’s greatest pitcher in all of blaseball!
_la la la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la._
_la la la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la._
_la la la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la._
_la la la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la._
a_ha, thank you, thank you
three, four!
[spoken outro: henry marshmallow, _his publicist_]
thank you, thank you again, thank you! thanks to my backing band, the mini marshmallows! ha_ha! they’re unionized now, i hate it!
(_no, no, y_ you’re pro_union, pro_union!_)
you might not know me, but my name is henry marshmallow, pitcher for the seattle garages, established baritone, aspiring tenor, but most of all, an incredible athlete. and i always have been, though i have to tell you i used to be made fun of all the time for my marshmallow condition_ i’m a marshmallow, in case you didn’t know
(_i don’t know what that is, [inaudible], sorry._)
actually in the minor leagues, i’d get heckled from the stands, like… “hey, marshmallow man! we’re gonna roast you! we’re gonna make you into a s’more!” and eventually i had it up to here and yelled back, “you know what, dude, i dare you. if you tried to make me into a s’more and eat me, your body would need to be, like, 20% insulin! so you can try and make me a s’more_”
(_henry, henry_ no, no, no__)
“_but i’m gonna, like, wreck your pancreas if you do!” so then they’d be pretty quiet_
(_hey, henry? no. you can’t talk about diabetic__)
just a sec, my publicist wants to talk…
(_you really can’t talk about diabetics like that, okay?_)
okay, great news, i’ve decided to apologize for the previous act_up_
(_jesus christ._)
__and_ i’m going to be making a large donation to the juvenile diabetes research foundation. shout out to everyone with type one diabetes_ nick jonas, ethan geller, justice sonia sotomayor, all champions in my opinion
(_who’s_ who’s even geller?_)
okay, i have one more thing to say actually_
(_what more could you_ possibly_)
if it was me at the end of ghostbusters instead of the stay_puft marshmallow man, i would’ve won. bill murray would be like, “aw, man! we were gonna ghostbust you, but you’re, like, really chill! do you want to make more movies with me?” then i would’ve been a movie star, maybe even become president_ then ronald reagan would’ve only had one term_
(_you are__)
iran_contra wouldn’t have happened_
(_woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, y__)
i would defund the cia_
(_you can’t say that!_)
the entire geopolitical landscape would be_
(_henry, henry, w_ we gotta stop._)
okay
(_you really gotta stop talking._)
my publicist is now telling me i really need to stop talking. thank you all, i’m henry marshmallow, good night, and go garages! park it! ha_ha, yeah, how was that?
(_g_good job! we’re_ we’re late for your appointment._)
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