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thani - the price of life lyrics
[verse 1: thani]
been thinkin’ ‘bout the time death and i first met
arrested in the last breath of the corpse on my left
daniel peaced before the baton fell
12 years of life had nuthin’ to offer
to help me cope with a soul’s departure
at the time, jus’ glad i ain’t know him
i ain’t envy his friends sacked by a halo
then eyes close (woah)
woke up in a sea of sad faces
his photo in the cove of an open black case
never heard his sax play so low
sheen o’ da keys mirrored da twinkle on each cheek near me
mouthpiece ain’t squeaking
see now i’m fearin’ one of these things ain’t like the others
house quiet (‘cause the pipes obstructed)
decade later (plumber still ain’t comin’)
thinkin’ all this water’s gonna one day flood up
been naggin’ my landlord ‘bout that
lookin’ back, you could say his death gave me life
took an axe to the barren faith inside
a flame inspired by this shook aback brain of mine
now hear the choir
[verse 2]
out of place with this suit pristine and some dirty beats
on da mic stupid dumpin’ all this filth out my mouth
i ain’t have no bib
hands so skittish, no kiddin’
“am i foolish?”
but i’m van gogh with the band flowin’
from my blue lips
seem like errybody’s my new biggest fan, yo
seem like errybody’s future (future) in my hand so, thanos
i p-ss god a prayer, then start huntin’ stardust in the air
this gift in my grip, it exists to declare that my bruh upstairs up-and-comin’ beware
“melodies for lebanese” to share this inheritance
it’s perilous (my sk!ll)
this ain’t arrogance (i will)
tear and barrel through this world
with my flair and two scripture
out-of-context, if i’m honest
but it seemin’ like he blessin’ every project that i launch, yeah
if i put my heart there, like a marvel
all i want accomplished, i -ssemble
my potential’s monumental
i’ll invent some kinda trend
with just my pencil and a pestle
i won’t rest ‘til erryone sees my g*nius
i mean, i mean my jesus
in the meantime, peep these lyrics
yes, really “fresh from the spirit”
hindsight ‘splains why i had the gall to sit on top the planet
truth be told, i really had it all and took it all for granted
always -ssumed that havin’ friends, yeah, was a given
to live different god’d have to k!ll my standard
[verse 3]
another year would prove to me he’s a capable -ss-ssin
the butchered text chain of a desperate conversationalist stared back and a lil’ sickness, sadness, n’ sorrow
united to slay my misconceptions
my mind’s detained by her older sister of the same name
was the same game i’m always playin’
guess i was lonely, ‘cause i blew it
god said, “if it ain’t broke: break it”
‘stead of verbalizing, i prescribed some
visual codeine to revive my heart
i am sorry, but my entire body
is writhin’, i gotta find a doct–
[verse 4]
but forget all that, studio day is here
must’ve been overreactin’, opportunity’s knockin’, ‘migo
came back strong on the outer, trauma on the inner
dis da pinnacle o’ hypocritical cripple
gilded capsule catchin’ every syllable
gamblin’ wit the wool
guised in epiphany
goin’ off on enemies
keen eyes all around me
like synchronized ch-r-ography
needles’ pirouettin’ to the best in denton
br-ss peekin’ through the gl-ss
so clean sound
each bounce of the sp-cebar
my labors fadin’
in the sp-ce amidst the wall o’ alb-ms of the greats
and changin’ the face of chh
but release day came; ain’t n-body say my name
release day came; stacks on stacks of wasted grace
release day came and i’m back in the locker room
my favorite truth is the kind i don’t gotta prove
my debut has made me out to be a martyr who
worked himself to death jus’ to harvest some rotten fruit
[verse 5]
j’pensais que j’pourrais être un pont pour aider le monde
et ce soir chuis debout sur le rail prêt à renoncer
“why do i keep writing songs?” (ain’t n-body listening)
« sept mètres peuvent mettre fin à ma peine quotidienne »
j’ai l’vertige, donc mon objectif se déplace plutôt vers la route
aucune voiture ne p-sse ; le pianissimo m’effarouche
les murmures de dieu pullulent au vent
mais autant en emporte le vent, franchement
alors, l’homme est du bois dont on fait les bûchers
donc, cet homme des bois connaitra l’orchestre d’escorte
oh la faim, emporte-moi au repos!
peut-être les arbres de la forêt rendrez mon âme penaud
une louve est sortie de ma tombe prochaine
m’a donné un pet-t coup d’coude à l’abdomen
par l’éclat de sa fourrure, elle m’a conduit à la maison
j’voulais qu’elle parle, mais pas un mot
(mais pas un mot)
[verse 6]
as the day breaks
feelin’ safe wrapped in blankets
prayin’, jus’ prayin’
to change summin’
been slavin’ over full-scale exposure
remainin’ stone cold under fire
no wonder steam comes out my ears
i know we’ve all been tatted with the ink of great failure
but i’ve been wonderin’ if this cardboard is god’s will
‘cause home is where my art is
but if home is where my heart is
i can put my feet up anywhere
‘cause he is everywhere
[verse 7]
24 years closer to freedom from this tether
when i write my last line, i’ll remember
‘bout the afterword of my biography
and what happened to me isn’t as important as what i think
daniel taught me that clocks can stop
minute hand snags; the gavel drops
also taught my first flaw:
i’m heartless; tear ducts faulty
distraught with the nonchalance
that’s when i learned ‘bout eternal purpose
the open-mic night taught me that i’m divinely stocked
wtih a taste aboundin’ for arranging sounds
and my talents got power; hours wicked
that’s when i learned to cash in on what i’m gifted
that fateful message taught me to be myself
and loneliness, it ain’t good!
i’d talk funny to charm honies
stop everything; get wedlocked at twenty
that’s when i learned i’m not healthy
(not healthy, not healthy)
but panhandle taught me that nuthin’ is for certain
thousands of dollars and thousands of hours
but thousands don’t know my poems
that’s when i learned i don’t need a legacy if god recalls my songs
the wolfess taught me i’d been stripped of nearly everything
i don’t have control over anything
‘cept how i’m spendin’ the minutes god’s given
that’s when i learned the time today is all we have, innit?
that night on the porch taught me to be quiet and listen
life is hard, but there’s always hope in him
life’s so hard, but there’s always sum’ we stand to lose in a fight
that’s when i learned the price of life
(death to my dreams)
(death to my dreams)
(here’s to the death of my dreams)
(death to my dreams)
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