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team internet - yelp this! lyrics

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[intro]
yeah
the michael phelps of yelp
the tom cruise of reviews
better watch you_

[verse 1: j. cyrus]
it was sat_rday, i was chillin’ with jane (hey)
we were at the bar just watchin’ the game (okay)
started getting hungry so i ordered some w_ngs
couldn’t believe my eyes when they finally came
hold up, wait, is this a joke? are you serious? (no)
lemme see your chef: is he blind or delirious? (what)
i wouldn’t eat this if you made it for free
i ain’t paying for this garbage that you plated for me
i’m screaming “h_ll no!”, i ain’t messing with this
who told you to sub fries for my celery sticks?
i’m about to call the manager and yell in his face
i want a complimentary meal and a h_ll of a steak
open up yelp, i can’t eat this food
the service too slow and the waitress was rude
and my order was wrong
man, shut this place down before the end of this song

[hook: j. cyrus & vincent marcus]
step back, i’m ’bout to yelp this
you gon’ need a whole lotta help ’cause you helpless, boom!
now watch how we do, put you outta business with just one review
step back, i’m ’bout to yelp this
you gon’ need a whole lotta help ’cause you helpless, boom!
now watch how we do, put you outta business with just one review
step back!
[verse 2: vincent marcus]
pull up to the hotel, trying to sleep (skrrt)
vacay with my girl, it’s a couple’s retreat (okay)
about to unpack and order something to eat
when i noticed there’s a juice stain under my feet
that’s nasty! what kinda place is this?
little bottles half full and the drapes are ripped
got the bell boy smellin’ like bacon chips
walk straight to the front desk raisin’ fists
yo, desk clerk! i need a whole new room
i want a luxury suite with orlando bloom
(i’m, i’m sorry, sir, but we really can’t do that. we’re a hotel. i mean that’s a little ridiculous)
ayo, shut up! i want a family suite
make up for my girl and a vanity, please!
7000 thread count, i want insanity sheets
or i’m about to open yelp and let profanity free

[hook: j. cyrus & vincent marcus]
step back, i’m ’bout to yelp this
you gon’ need a whole lotta help ’cause you helpless, boom!
now watch how we do, put you outta business with just one review
step back, i’m ’bout to yelp this
you gon’ need a whole lotta help ’cause you helpless, boom!
now watch how we do, put you outta business with just one review
step back!
[verse 3: j. cyrus]
ayo, one star for my grandma’s house (whaa)
smellin’ like old people, grammy, i’m out (sorry)
one star for this lady’s hair
lookin’ like she tryna start another family in there (it’s too big)
and one star for card from dave
“get well soon!”, real original, dave!
one star for this make out sesh
step back, beth, get a hold of your breath
if you parking in my sp_ce, i’ma yelp that
if you gotta funny face, i’ma yelp that
you gotta iphone 4, i’ma yelp that
and if your table manner’s poor, i’ma yelp that
open up yelp, one star for this song
the beats h_lla wack and the lyrics are wrong (it sucks)
(i mean, i thought it was decent. i mean, we both wrote this song)

[hook: j. cyrus & vincent marcus]
step back, i’m ’bout to yelp this
you gon’ need a whole lotta help ’cause you helpless, boom!
now watch how we do, put you outta business with just one review
step back, i’m ’bout to yelp this
you gon’ need a whole lotta help ’cause you helpless, boom!
now watch how we do, put you outta business with just one review
step back!

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