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real as shit - shazam jakey ft. mc jp lyrics
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[intro: realisticlee]
i forgot to turn on the f_cking mic b_tch
[verse 1: realisticlee]
on the floor, the the film, the jakey did chuck
it was only his luck
the only place it could tuck
was beside his limp c_ck
shoved the dvd that was dc
right down the front of his jea_eans
on the cover was zachari levi
the jakey’s jeans were not levis
i lost my phone this was not wise lee
this was the jakey’s plan that he did devise
wondering where these jakey’s eyes be
he looks inside mе
this does not excite mе
[verse 2] mc a$$
shazam, for a dc hero you’re just marvellous
billy undergoes metamorphosis
looking in the window, larcenist
did a double chin grow, narcissist
holy moly i’m big, like a man child
your temperament is really mild
you fight with might try using your brain
don’t complain when you lose to bane
next to batman you’re a pacifist
when you fight crime you make wayne look like a m_s_ch_st
billy’s underpants are tight enough to castrate
to recreate is not your fate
it’s time to evacuate[no not the pool]
why use a bag when you can put it next to your bawbag
is that a dvd or are you just pleased to see me
doon his trouser like a loser spent your life doon at the boozer
[chorus: mc jp realisticlee, mc a$$]
and his plan
was to shove shazam
right down his pants
then f_ck off in advance
and his plan
was to shove shazam
right down his pants
then f_ck off in advance
and his plan
was to shove shazam
right down his pants
then f_ck off in advance
[verse 3:realisticlee]
red suit, yellow bolt, white cape
wraps tight, round his nape
billy batson is basically a fake superman, what a b_st_rd
unlike the real shazam
the bullet would not bounce off when the gun goes kablam
when he utters the magic words he gets struck in the p_n_s
the wizards p_ssed off, he really means it
you were good but you lose it and now you’ve lost it
doctor sivana this ain’t the music app
shazam, created by the faucet
into magical powers billy does tap
supercharging phones with bolts of electricity
supercharged prices in this city
written by bill parker, not to be confused with uncle ben
the seven deadly sins, who f_cked up way back when
[verse 4: mc a$$]
flying through the air like zachary
fully charged 100% battery
you’ll bring down the roof like i did
but whatever you do, can’t be worse than my kids
billy listen to me and you’ll be free
to do sh_t so easily like me
stop punching the dead man’s chest
his heart is protected by a bullet proof vest
flying high up in the sky, with a better view than a crow’s nest
you need to be smart, not just look into your heart
if you want to conquer the best
banished to the stars, [?] [?] the tides of change
five thousand years later, he’ll be back in range
with the resolve of a terminator
shouting ”i’ll be back” like schwarzenegger
make sure he’s dead proper
send him to davey jones locker
[chorus: mc jp, mc a$$, realisticlee]
and his plan
was to shove shazam
right down his pants
then f_ck off in advance
and his plan
was to shove shazam
right down his pants
then f_ck off in advance
and his plan
was to shove shazam
right down his pants
then f_ck off in advance
[verse 5: mc a$$]
sh_t in my garden
i’m not begging your pardon
i’ll wait for it to harden
then throw it back at you
i dare you to do a poo
when a smackhead smacks heads
the bill gets bigger like giraffe necks
and then the crack gets
obnoxious, like a dog that whacks pets
saying ”get out of my bed crackhead”
f_cking jakey, i’ll give some irn bru 32
wakey wakey
[verse 6: realisticlee]
this jake did take a weird stance to make
sure that his film was safe
right in front of my mates
but you’re not gonna create a jakey outta me
when the lightning strikes the bolt will castrate
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