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portals - desolation lyrics

after all of this time, i still can’t say that i’m fine
i’m still searching for security inside my clouded mind
you’ve made your mistakes, i know i’ve made mine, but i just wanted an apology for years of wasted time
for the tongue is a fire, and i was set ablaze by the ignorance and arrogance that you displayed
you fed me lies
looked into my eyes, told me that h-ll awaited me for how i lived my life
your words cut deeper than a spear to the rib
with time, i’m hoping i can learn to forgive
i just can’t forget the things that you said
how all of these years later, you’re still stuck inside my head
you dug deep, unearthing feelings foreign to me
the edges fell away with the strike of your spade
unrelenting, the emptiness is all that remains
every lash of your tongue dug my grave
i won’t let you bury me
i just wanted you to see that the consequences of your actions left impressions i won’t forget
lasting reminders of time spent wasted
it’s bittersweet to know that you created me
you were the catalyst to my suffering
i hope that heaven is real, so you can finally understand how it feels to watch something that you once loved go up in smoke
to feel the desolation in the absence of hope
i hope you watch me burn
i hope the salt stings your eyes
watching down from above as you listen to my cries
i hope you watch me burn

- portals

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