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party fun action committee - beer lyrics
[spoken intro]
[chad] grrreetings everybody
[mark] hey pipe down back there!
[chad] my name is chad, this is my right-hand man: the markster
[mark] hey that’s mark to you guys!
[chad] and we are presidents of the alpha pi kappa fraternity
[mark] yeah! we are!
[chad] we’d like to welcome you to rush week
now i know you guys have a lot of questions but listen we got [????]
so check it out…
[hook 2x]
we’re here
it’s the alpha pi kappa. beer
yo dude, i got a keg to tap. no queers
allowed inside of our frat house. cheers
hold up your cup and f-ckin’ chug
[verse one]
[chad] two words to describe our frat: wicked awesome
i mean on thursdays we do charity midget tossin’
i’m sayin’ dude, alpha pi kappa knows how to party
[mark] aw dude, give us a keg and we’ll get wicked [rappin??]
like this one time at the sorority, we pulled a panty raid
we bought roofies and beer, dude: we all got laid!
[chad] you see this white hat? it says “co-ed naked lacrosse”
check out the curve of the brim: it’s wicked awesome
[mark] you know what else is wicked awesome? smokin’ the dope
and puttin’ on “legend” by bob marley, that guy f-ckin’ rules!
[chad] yeah, but speakin’ of tunes dude, i love that dave matthews
especially at a party when i’m bombed off my -ss, dude!
[mark] yeah, my favorite state? i’d have to say m-ss, dude
yeah boston is awesome, i got a bruins tattoo
the chicks dig it, yeah and the chicks dig me
cause alpha pi kappa brothers get the most p-ssy!
[chad] now don’t be offended ladies, you know we’re just jokin’
believe me, i know pain: i’ve had my heart broken
see i was only 16, and her name was kirsten
we used to walk in the park and listen to dave matthews….
…[mark] yo, you’re soundin’ wicked queer right now
[background chatter]
[mark] bro, i got a case of bud dry, dude, let’s break out the funnel
put the tube in your mouth, i’ll pull the beer and you guzzle
[chad] hey, bro bro! j.b. just totally put on my song!
-jump around! jump around! jump up, jump up and get down!-
[hook x2]
[spoken]
[chad] yeah, that’s pretty much the fun part right there
but before you get in you gotta do the hard part
it’s rush week bro, you gotta do some tests man
you gotta p-ss the test
[mark] let me tell these motherf-ckers what’s up!
[verse two]
[mark] for the next seven days, you’ll be treated like sh-t
to be an a.p.k. brother, you gotta earn it!
[chad] we all did!
[mark] you see all this? it doesn’t come easy
[chad] so put on these blindfolds and get on your knees
that’s right ladies, rush week has officially begun
so stick this cherry up your -ss and do a 50-yard run
[mark] and if it falls out your -ss, you’re sh-t outta luck
cause then you gotta eat that cherry! [dude that f-ckin’ sucks!]
[chad] of course it sucks
[mark] but you gotta have heart and be a fighter!
[chad] so everyone take a shot of jagermeister
and make out with the gregmeister
i know what you’re thinkin’: it sounds kinda queer
[mark] but that’s something you gotta do to get up in here
[up in here, up in here, ya’ll gonna make me show my head….]
[mark] so all you filthy pledges, here’s something to get used to
for the next week you’ll be wearing a tutu
and a hat that says “f-ggot”
and you better have it on 24/7
[chad] cause if you take it off for one second i’d hate to be your r-ct-m
now everyone gather ’round this hot pie of pizza
i want you all to jerk off and the last one to c-m f-ckin’ eats it
[mark] dude you think this sh-t sucks? it only gets tougher
for when you do the pi kappa challenge, then you’ll really suffer
the pi kappa challenge is f-ckin’ wicked important
[chad] dude, i mean seriously, it’s like totally a tradition
[mark] so here’s the rundown of all the events in the challenge:
i’m talkin’ keg-stands
[chad] shaved heads
[mark] paddles
[chad] and tossed salads
hours of group showers, covered in baby powder
[mark] you gotta push it to the limit: love it, learn it and live it
[chad] yeah, this frat’s a lot of things:
k!ller, cool beans, awesome, kick–ss, k!ller, wicked awesome [f-ck yeah]
[mark] so to all you pledges i wish you good f-ckin’ luck
[chad] now guys you should really get some zs
cause tomorrow you’re gonna f-ck. all right?
[spoken]
[chad] and just [??] bring some condoms cause at pi kappa we really support safe s-x
[mark] have a good beauty sleep, ladies
[hook x2]
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