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parodocity - [gay parody] eastern philosophers vs western philosophers lyrics
[intro]
epic rap battles of history!
lao tzu, sun tzu, and confucius!
versus!
nietzsche, socrates, and voltaire!
begin!
[socrates]
i’m coming off father c_ckulus to start some pandemonium
don’t bring limp d_cks to a pimp pr_cks simposium
the mad f_gfly, being g_y was my invention
[nietzsche]
rolling with the hair stylist
[voltaire]
and me
[nietzsche]
we got the daddies
[voltaire]
and the kinks
[socrates]
that even i would question
[voltaire]
dropping my baldi b_llsack
[nietzsche & socrates & voltaire]
on these east infections
[nietzsche]
it’s evident
[voltaire]
you’ve never been
[nietzsche & socrates & voltaire]
our type of booty brethren
we’re better
[nietzsche]
twinkers
[socrates]
better nutters
[voltaire]
better f_ckers
[nietzsche & socrates & voltaire]
better men
[confucius]
this type of arrogance is surе to be expectеd
from men who speak of p_n_s with no clue of what s_x is
[lao tzu]
these westerners are sloppy, needing discipline in bed
you lack control of yourselves, and of other men
[sun tzu]
while we use precise sucks to disrupt your concentration
[confucius]
and you an ass_l!cking our descendants will honor for generations
[sun tzu]
we fill a booty
[lao tzu]
with cum
[sun tzu]
and your daddies
[confucius]
with s_m_n
[lao tzu & sun tzu & confucius]
but you’ll never hold a candle to the men we’ve been in
[nietzsche]
oh, i’ll give you something you can put your tiny d_cks in
when i squat down and make them disappear like a magician
you need to take control of the c_cks you’re given
every time i take a sh_t my ass starts bleeding
[voltaire]
i’m a conformist
so confronting you in our dms? that’s my job
got a sharp d_ck when i whip it’ll skewer you like a confu_shish_kebab (oh!)
you flubbed your mission, i’m f_cking your submissive ass into submission
dishing out more d_cks than p_ssies then [incomprehensible mumbling]
publishing!
[socrates]
now that we’ve covered the two femboys, it’s time to move onto trappy_chan
sun tzu, i’ll be ripping apart your b_tt with my p_n_s, man
the seminal general isn’t so hard on the mic
all your men must be like, ‘yo, what happened?’
you’re pitifully lyrically
lucky for history, you didn’t offer the art of fapping
[sun tzu]
b_tch, i wrote the art of cum, so you better whip your d_cks out
these white boys getting burned, ‘cause guess what?
now my d_ck’s out
asians spitting sick, but no, not an std
laozi, kiss my ass, now confucius, drop your pants
[confucius]
let me be candid with you, voltaire
fresh shirt with the egg noodle d_ck
your p_n_s is just so distracting
free speech doesn’t mean just keep fapping
and you k!lled god, so i gotta ask:
did he die of shame when he made you a f_g?
you try to plan a new german psyche
but you just grew hate, me no dir dyk_y
[sun tzu]
and it all starts with you, you’re a f_ggot, socrates
honestly, i think you owe both of these twinkies here an apology
[nietzsche]
i wouldn’t exactly call myself a twink, you little sh_t
don’t make nietzsche come over there and put a d_ck up where you (yaaaaaaa)
cause this is parodocity
and i’ll f_ck any motherf_cker like my name, f_ck_a_f_ck_a_fee
[socrates]
parodocity? i’ll f_ck you like an std
hang a sandal on the door cause you can s my d!
[voltaire]
sock ra blee, socrates! you’re making things a little g_y
come, let’s blind these chinese hinies with a shiny pride parade
[socrates]
i’ll not be taught tolerance from a f_g who rigged the lottery
you make a mockery of f_ggots, so keep your fat d_ck in my coffee!
[voltaire]
let me be g_y, don’t start beef with the g_y
who hangs with the g_ys, making men be g_y!
[sun tzu]
we have turned them on themselves, their chaos is our opportunity!
[lao tzu]
we must remember, a mouth is most useful when it is empty
[sun tzu]
augh, laozi, i don’t mean no disrespect
but you need to fill your mouth with my d_ck, you piece of sh_t!
[lao tzu]
oh, you don’t want to stand in the path of lao tzu today
i’ll make you cry, b_tch, you gettin’ raped!
[confucius]
woah, where in the tradition of sword fighting _n_l fistin’
that two dudes on the same team should f_ck like a little d_ckens
[sun tzu]
yo, confucius, you’re always tryna put something in your ass
why don’t you take your eyebrows and shove ‘em up your ass?
[confucius]
okay, i see, you wanna make me a f_g?
i’ll smack that warmongering c_ck out of your to_go box hat
here’s the real golden rule, i’m always on top
confucius say you can all hold
my c_ck
[outro]
what is sounding?
it sounds rather painful
video game rap battles!
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