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nalyd - lucid dreams lyrics
vii. the lucid dreamer
last weekend i was high for the 1st time in my entire life and i found myself less stressed and i was utterly baffled at how my worries and self-deprecating short c-mmings i feel every single day so easily faded away and seeped into my skin without being acknowledged as if my concerns were like black paint slowly drying on a cool summer evening. the euphoria which overtook my body was so liberating,i have never truly felt carefree and weightlessness like i did that night. my inner thoughts of subliminally trying to prove myself to the girl i love were no longer a priority. i dislike the fact i am trying to prove myself to her when i know confidently she has zero interest in me but i guess my life is a movie
i had a dream about her
she was waking me up, she said “dylan, i love you.” “dylan, the sun is out” “i watched the sunrise through the blind of our window as i held you close” in this dream of marijuana smoke and some far-fetched fantasy i felt so happy and content
this dream was so real
i felt like for once i made someone believe in me. i remember looking into her face and crying because i had never been more happy in my life
it was bliss, it was perfect, it was the way things should be but then i awoke in an odd slumber. i was in a small empty bedroom on the floor, i stood up and i was no longer higher than the trees and rambunctious as the bees. i was my worst nightmare, i seen reality and for once i made myself resent every decision i’ve ever made to make her hate me. i blamed the high,i blamed the b-tterfly wings for altering what might have ultimately changed the course of how things could have been. i remember looking into the mirror and crying because i had never been more sad in my life
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