my emotions are explosions i’m hoping you wouldn’t notice
but this anger and this commotion makes it so much harder to focus
maybe i’ll soon blow up – in what way? you’d think i’d know this
but this hopeless book of my poems makes a rap dream seem something bogus
i’m an eggsh-ll you cannot open without proper tools and components
when you’re in, i’m still too chicken to own up to what’s got me broken
deep down i’m so scared that any spotlight i’ll get is stolen
so i give it my godd-mn all and sing for the moment before postponement
who am i kidding? i just don’t fit in like the shirt is too little bruv
should’t fiddle with arts and a chisel if my scribble don’t sizzle ‘nough
load up a pistol and let it whistle, but would anybody give a f-ck?
would they watch my head get hit with slugs, my goose is cooked, i’m a sitting duck, yo
the amount of raps i’ve discarded and countless wack beats i’ve started
make you wonder how i have hardened from all the blunders suffered as an artist
’cause i’m rougher than a beagle that’s all barker and no bite
tough when i speak to people but where it’s dark, there’s no fight
’cause i’m just too f-cking drained to battle pain the whole night
so i shoo away and evade any sight of my soul’s fright
but i’m mad when you burst through the surface, i got a purpose but is it worth it?
to unearth my sk!ll in these verses, would it be surplus, thrown into the furnace?
should i back off?
let it burn for a bit?
learn from it?
turn it into a verse that’ll be heard by the ears of a journalist, verbalist?
or is it all for nothing?
or were my friends all bluffing?
you’ll be slaying iconic names, dethrone every single sire
saying my tracks are flames when they should be thrown in the fire
i’m not saying i don’t seek no dominance, i’m claiming i don’t feel no confidence
playing with my evil consciousness, how can i get a seat on top of this?
when i’m chained up to my cells and i cannot escape my mind
restrained to myself, so i bet make good of my time
or my dreams will stay just dreams that i see when i go to sleep
potential leaks out the seams but it seems they got lost at see
of newbies who meet the scene to create ’cause it costs a fee
of your time, health and your smiles to impress gods who done bossed emcees
and writing all his sh-t helps, but it’s h-ll and i’m still susceptible
to the writhing, fits and conflicts that make dreams seem dumb regrettable
when all i wish is one chance to dispel doubts that i am incredible
’til then i’m just some dumb kid with no grins, no wins, my confessional, f-ck