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mushy mustard - shabby birthday lyrics

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[intro: simon, lewis]
is this gonna be a bit cr_p?
no, it’ll be great, you’ll have a fantastic fun time at this party

[verse 1: mustard]
had a birthday party, i’m not too happy
overall, it was too shabby
the dj was awful immediately
he just played this beat repeatedly, it sucks
they hired a clown
but i guess that day he was feeling down
because he just sat on a bench and smoked
he didn’t tell any jokes
none of my presents were any good
it seems like n0body understood
what makes a good present
the gifts were overall unpleasant
one box just had a rat inside
which would’ve been kinda cool if it hadn’t died
people all sang happy birthday out of key
shabby birthday to me

[interlude: lewis, simon, mustard, b natural]
oh, that was hard going, wasn’t it?
this is the worst birthday party i’ve ever been to
three, two, one, go
a shabby birthday is what you get
when you’re a_
oh, frick
you assh0l_
sorry, okay
three, two, one, go
[verse 2: b natural]
a shabby birthday is what you get
when you’re a dumb idiot
who forgot when his birthday is
now all you get for your birthday is p_ss
i like when you forget your birthday
then i don’t have to give you a
big nice gift and instead i can
direct you towards another man
and i bet that man’s not as good a clown as me
oh right, did i mention? i’m a clown, see
my relationship with the protagonist is
i’m a clown and he’s my assis_
_tant who loves to watch me perform on his birthday
i guess we have pretty cool lives, also we’re g_y
but today he doesn’t get a birthday because he forgot
guess we’re not gonna do the birthday frot

[interlude: mustard, b natural, stir]
you were on beat for a while, and then you just suddenly stopped for no reason
oh really? i didn’t notice
what a drag!

[verse 3: stir]
this verse is all about a birthday of mine that was very shabby
when i looked in the mirror my pecs which are usually rock hard muscles were flabby
and since it was my birthday i had to entertain guests coming over
so i didn’t have enough time to pump iron or run on the treadmill
at the party i wanted to get on my nintendo ds and play on it
so i could play super mario brothers
but since i was the host i had to
stay out in the kitchen with the others
there was a magician at the party doing some tricks with the hat on his head
but i much would have preferred if he was a funny clown doing tricks instead
also on that day the power went out
and the toilet paper almost ran out
and i accidentally changed_ i accidentally changed my computer wallpaper
to a picture that was really lame
and my shoelaces on my shoes came undone
so i had to tie them again
[interlude: lewis, simon]
good grief
i didn’t enjoy this, this wasn’t a good party
no, well, we’ll work on it for next year

[verse 4: batter]
why are these beats all so f_cking slow?
alright, i guess it’s my turn to go
i went to a shabby birthday yesterday
i had to ride my unicycle the whole f_cking way
seventy miles in the rain
when i got there, the cake was made out of cellophane
a cheapo was hosting this party
and the kid whose birthday it was was a smarty
she kept cracking jokes at everyone’s expense
she made fun of me for only having six pence
to spend on my outfit that i showed off for her
i came to your birthday, now get off my fur
the streamers were torn, the confetti was brittle
the presents were for some reason covered in spittle
the children there were all rich snot_nosed freaks
i mean, i make six figures a year but who are they to speak
my clothes were all torn and_

[outro: mustard, twilightskyline, leigh]
hey, leigh, if you wrote a verse for the song “shabby birthday,” what would it be about?
well, the other day, it was my birthday, and everyone forgot
and i tell you what, i think they can all go rot
there_ yeah, there was one time where i did have a birthday, and i invited a bunch of people, and only one person showed up, so probably that
it was a shabby birthday, but it wasn’t too bad
in fact, i think because my friend came, she made it a little bit more rad
no, i think that made it worse, ’cause then i think she told the people, like, at school, like, ha ha, n0body showed up
she told everyone at school she was the only friend i had
and then that made me very much extremely mad
kevin, you don’t want to be part of this project? you’re a natural
frick no
you should just, like, take all the snippets of him rapping throughout his streams and put it in there
oh, dude, i’m gonna clip this right now and download it
what the f_dg_? dude, i’m literally gonna_
ha ha
i’m literally gonna sue you if you do that, mustard

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