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monica hill trejo - intro poem lyrics
[talk: monica hill trejo]
my whole life i struggled with depression, second guessing my existence
questioned why the mishaps in my life were so persistent
when i’m actually happy for a moment, the happiness shatters in an instant
learned at a young age not to get my hopes up
you look forward to anything, eventually, boom it blows up
what i thought was love, was shown out of anger
so i decided to search for love with complete strangers
along that road i was led to danger, l_st, lies that only brokе me more inside
thеy must use me, abuse me, like vultures, saying on to the next
breaking me of any confidence i had left, laying alone painful groans
an innocent child that never took it’s first breath
can never forgive myself for the decisions i’ve made
i hated me, so i took those pills to diminish my name
didn’t work, huh, so again i tried to slice my veins
still i felt left living in shame, bandages on my wrist people asking me questions
answer with a fake smile, oh it’s nothing
third attempt, laying there in the water
voices telling me to do it, you can’t go on like this any further
held my breath with my head under until i couldn’t breath no more
came up gasping for air i couldn’t breath no more
life flashed before my eyes, i’m about to die
couldn’t inhale or exhale, the third attempt had went well
till i closed my eyes, and i saw flashes of h_ll
then and there i feels like i be in h_ll forever
down there wishing i would’ve handled it better
it had to be god that breathed that next breath in me
at the same time he opened my eyes to see
lifted the evil covering that was blinding me, at that moment i cried
looked up to heaven and thanked god for saving my life
what the devil made for bad, lord you made for right
a testimony to this day, that can change so many lives
if anybody going through the same pain and strife
living proof that your the truth, we’re healed by your stripes
i can never explain the feeling of god’s love with the words that i say
it’s up to you to take that step forward
breakthrough, a military movement or advance, all the way through and beyond an enemies frontline defense
penetrating obstacles, overcome impossible
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