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misty maestro - saddest satirist كلمات الأغنية

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[intro]
i’m tired, i’m getting tired
yeah, i know what you mean
sometimes i think if it’s worth it
sometimes i think no
i’m sisyphus, but without the fabulous hair and the loincloth pushing that boulder up that hill over and over
try it in heels
i’m working to pay the lawyers
i’m broke

[verse 1]
saddest satirist
i’m not fond of this, the problem is
looking at the grey skies thinking if my mama proud of this
if my name isn’t lenny bruce
i wouldn’t choose this route to light the mood
of this city covered by the fog of gloom
whomever told me this life was meant for me
i find it funny, i was misunderstood
using humour to mask my bruise
the people don’t wanna hear it the spoken truth
but they pay attention when i’m clownin’ in a suit
so, stress i got a boatload, but the world don’t care
performing for a clubhouse of millionaires
since when i was a youngin’ i know this wouldn’t be fair
spending my nights rethinking my life seeing ceils of a cell
but h_ll, didn’t i make it out
went from sleeping in the attic to getting paid by being charismatic
now my life kinda hectic, chopping white lines i’m an addict
and she acting frantic whenever i’m acting out, panic
at the disco, sippin’ gin imagining mrs. maisel would ever exist maybe so or maybe not
a light breeze of wind swept through the back of my neck
my hands trembling fumbling through the bottles and needles in search of a picture of her
reflections of a glass table a look concerned
will my last breath be a last laugh
will i reach the doorsteps of heaven asking for my cash back
if so will i bring my riches through
as i stare into the dark abyss
my consciousness is reaching in a memory so far fetched
reminisce materials rather dense
they take offense and i take a fence
cause non of y’all are making common sense
and you still call me your f_cking friend
d_mn
[chorus]
if i die right now
it’s a beautiful death
i got your picture to my chest
this life is coming to an end
running out of time

[verse 2]
angelic melodies are telling me
this pain is for one to face
the silver lining i’m finding is blinding
it’s finna fill your heart with hate
did my set and rep
paid in scr_p, tryna avoid my debt
collector around the corner, my life’s a wreck
matter fact
12 dollars and a bowl of pasta isn’t really what i’m after
rather, life’s a joke now how i cope
i’ll drown in my sorrows, i’m sorry
i quite enjoy the sunshine as much as the rain
if it wasn’t for you, i might just throw myself away
fade to black, back to black, day drinking back to back
tryna run away from my life in this culdesac
when i realize i’m the only one holding back
what i could be, what i should be
what i practice
ten thousand hours in i’m a natural at this
cause honestly
if not me then who else
imma stand up against authority till my foot swells
my name smells, stuck in the same cells
and they stomp me till i can’t tell
what’s right or wrong, with my wife gone
the beatings starts to hurt more
and i’m just human
i wanna hit a club and f_ck a dime
my success is overshadowed by how they define a crime
how can i find my inner peace of mind
so i smile wry
as an atheist, i still ask god why?
[chorus]
if i die right now
it’s a beautiful death
i got your picture to my chest
this life is coming to an end
running out of time

[verse 3]
and as i go through life, the pain subsides
left a trail of crime notarized
griping to the bags of money i need all of mines
budgeting my time call me jack the reaper
remember back when ma told me she’s a keeper
ha
now this hill is getting steeper
he knows i’m a non_believer
the air is thin, my mind is grim, pushing up this boulder to escape my sins
my next of kin won’t vouch for me
probably, laying in this couch i’ll pray for a better day
i medicate to relieve the pain
to keep my sane
i know i should be stronger
but how can i sustain the hunger, when all i get is defeat
your size don’t fit
i reach my peak, i can’t speak, call my honey bruce tell her my will is weak
cause i’m the greatest in the making that’s something that i’m sure of
but my families say i’m full of sh_t
i confess i’m second_guessing the pounding in my chest
for the love of the game, will it ever last?
certainly i’m last to be casted
went from crashing in couches to cashing in mansions
but i’m still anxious, just got better at hiding it
i wonder if it was worth it, did i put enough work in?
do i keep going, looking for what i’m still searching?
truly i was hurting, she left me when i needed her most
increased the dose when i thought the concrete grows a rose
and my heart of gold is now froze, outta cold
[chorus]
if i die right now
it’s a beautiful death
i got your picture to my chest
this life is coming to an end
running out of time

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