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mel brooks - keep it gay lyrics
max:
did you get a chance yet to read springtime for hitler?
roger:
read it? i devoured it! and i find it remarkable,
remarkable!
max:
then you’ll do it?
roger:
do it? of course not.
it’s not my kind of thing
i mean, max please. world war ii?
oooo. too dark. too depressing.
the theatre’s so obsessed
with dramas so depressed
it’s hard to sell a ticket on broadway
shows should be more pretty
shows should be more witty
shows should be more…
what’s the word?
leo:
gay?
roger:
exactly!
no matter what you do on the stage
keep it light, keep it bright, keep it gay!
whether it’s murder, mayhem or rage
don’t complain, it’s a pain
keep it gay!
carmen:
people want laughter when they see a show
the last thing they’re after’s a litany of woe
roger & carmen:
a happy ending will pep up your play…
roger:
oedipus won’t bomb…
carmen:
if he winds up with mom!
keep it gay!
roger:
keep it gay…
roger & carmen:
keep it gay!
max:
couldn’t agree more. and you have our blessings, roger,
to make springtime for hitler just as gay as anyone
could possibly want.
so, c’mon, do it for us, please.
roger:
i’m sorry, max, but it’s simply not my cup of tea.
still, fair is fair, perhaps i should ask my production
team what they think.
max:
you’re production team. who are they?
roger:
you’ll see. they all live here.
guys! come say h-llo to bialystock and bloom!
this is my set designer, bryan.
bryan:
keep it mad, keep it glad, keep it gay!
roger:
and here’s my costume designer, kevin.
kevin:
h-llo…
keep it happy, keep it snappy, keep it gay!
bryan & kevin:
we’re clever, creative
it’s our job to see
that ev’rything’s perfect for mr. de bris!
roger:
scott, my ch-r-ographer…
scott:
hi there…
roger:
and, ah, finally, last and least, my lighting designer,
shirley markowitz.
shirley:
keep it gay, keep it gay, keep it gay
roger:
now, they all just read springtime. what do you think
fellas?
bryan:
it needs glamour…
kevin:
and blitz…
scott:
it needs sequence…
shirley:
and t-ts.
roger. i think that springtime for hitler
would be a marvelous opportunity for you. i mean, up to
now,
you’ve always been -ssociated with, dare i say it,
frivolous musicals.
roger:
you’re right. i’ve often felt as though i’ve been
throwing my life away
on silly little entertainments. deopy showgirls in
gooey gowns. it’s enough to make you heave.
nonetheless, i’m sorry, max.
i just couldn’t do springtime for hitler
max:
why not? think of the respect.
roger:
no.
max:
think of the prestige.
roger:
no, no, no.
max:
think of … the tony!
carmen & the team:
tony…tony…tony…tony…tony!
roger:
ngaaaaaahhhhh!
max:
what’s the matter?
leo:
is he all right?
carmen:
he’s having a stroke…
max & leo:
what?
carmen:
…of genius!
roger:
i see it! i see it! at last. the chance to do something
important!
carmen:
roger de bris presents history!
roger:
of course that whole second act has to be rewritten.
they’re losing the war? excuse me. it’s too downbeat.
carmen:
roger de bris presents history!
roger:
but maybe…it’s a wile idea, but it just might work…
i see a line of beautiful girls
dressed as storm troopers, each one a gem
with leather boots and whips on their hips
it’s risque, dare i say, s & m!
carmen & the team:
love it!
roger:
i see german soldiers dancing through france
played by chorus boys in very tight pants
and wait, there’s more – they win the war!
and the dances they do will be daring and new
turn-turn-kick-turn, turn-turn-kick-turn
one-two-three-kick-turn!
keep it s-ssy, keep it cl-ssy, keep it…
max:
that is brilliant. brilliant! roger, i speak for mr.
bloom and myself
when i say that you are the only man in the world who
can do justice
to springtime for hitler. will you do it, please?
leo:
please.
roger:
wait a minute. this is a very big decision. it might
effect the course of my entire life.
i shall have to think about it…i’ll do it. i’ll do
it!
sabu, champagne!
roger, carmen & the team:
if at the end you want them to cheer
keep it gay, keep it gay, keep it gay
whether it’s hamlet, oth-llo or lear
keep it gay, keep it gay, keep it gay
carmen:
comedy’s joyous, a constant delight
dramas annoy us…
roger & carmen:
…and ruin our night.
roger, carmen & the team:
so keep your strindbergs and ibsens at bay…
roger:
i’ll sign…
kevin:
sign…
bryan:
sign…
scott:
sign…
carmen:
sign…
shirley:
sign…
max & leo:
sign…
roger:
roger elizabeth de bris!
all:
keep it gay!!
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