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mc paul barman - school anthem lyrics
it’s true most of the time in cl-ss i was tempted to “fool around man”
(laughs)
that’s what it was, yeah… you’d be bored and you’d figure
“well why not deprive someone else of their education”
verse 1:
i may be kidding school’s just babysitting
i knew girls in ap cl-sses knitting, so tedious
homework is tell major lies or plagiarize encyclopedias, so boring
fresh-faced teachers want to tickle ’em
but a test-based curriculum excludes exploring
i’ll let a mystery gas out of my blistery -ss
just to disrupt the misery of history cl-ss
and to entertain your tender brain
when your pain is the same as a fender bender with a train
-n-lyze the engines if you gotta go to the rhododendrons
cut cl-ss then serve detentions
say toodle-oo to the trimmed poodles who
will grow up to be the adults you now hate, i know what’s futile too
like throwing a spear at choate, i’m not here to gloat
i want to be used as your yearbook quote
abolish cl-ss rank, pour sugar in its gas tank
weighted grades really yank my -ss crank
and stop up my leak hole
english and autoshop should be equal
anyway an a is a weak goal
so stultifying, it’s hard to hold off dying
i’m spying on a lobbyist, it’s obvious
double teachers’ salaries and hire smarter
discard the farters who only inspire fire starters
what is the meaning of c.l.a.s.s.?
is it a conspiracy levelled at sleepy students trying to p-ss?
“oh my, what a disgrace…”
verse 2:
make like a whirlybird and graduate early, word
or pull all the stops out
make the proprietors of a mom and pop shop’s eyes pop out
and drop out
when i yawn it’s hard to hold in drool, drawn dreams of a molten pool
of magma rock raining ragnarok
on the whole d-mn school
scenes of the old and fool-ish and possibly cruel
administrators being told the golden rule
while rolled in stool
superficial superintendant
repainting the facade and bannister
i’m going to switch your contact lens vial
for a drosophilia melanogaster cannister:
i found college awkward another teacher, same old chalkboard
i felt i was shifting bawkward when i expected to shoot forward
could i possibly have been more bored?
realistically, a stressful sideways
still skipping readings, still waiting for fridays
school was so d-mn boring
it left me colder than the o-ring
which would not expand and destroyed the uss challenger in 1986
an overhaul is long overdue
i’m 0 for 2, if so are you
catch the fever from wallace shawn
to destroy school ’til all is goooooooone
“he was the first one to get a hawaiin nose-humming”
“-n-lyze the results”
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