matxeus - half alive lyrics
[verse 1]
no i don’t understand
how i’m back here again
just when i said i was done
stopped putting effort in
told myself it’s the end
threw my life away all for what
all the walls are closing in
losing all my oxygen
can’t push a breath out my lungs
so how am i supposed to win
if i can’t even comprehend
how to make the right choice for once
[pre_chorus]
so i’m, hoping, that you could save me
this time, ‘fore all the memories fade
from your mind, can’t let this chance go to waste
‘cause no matter what
[chorus]
know i’d cross the stars
to get through to you
hold you in my arms ‘cause if you only knew
how much that i feel
the way that i do
and every road i take leads me to you
know i can’t disguise
how much that i try
and constantly fail to keep you off my mind
so i’m signing off
this is my last goodbye
‘cause without you here i’m only half alive
only half alive
[verse 2]
i said that this would be the start
a brand new life, i played the part
and acted like it’d all be fine
i figured it was worth the cost
and hoped that you had never caught
the fact that i’m still on decline
‘cause all i’d do is set you off
if you knew how i really was
and had to deal with that all this time
so i just keep up my facade
to act like nothing’s ever wrong
and maybe you’ll stay in my life
[pre_chorus]
so i’m, hoping, that you could save me
this time, ‘fore all the memories fade
from your mind, i’ll do whatever it takes
‘cause no matter what
[chorus]
know i’d cross the stars
to get through to you
hold you in my arms ‘cause if you only knew
how much that i feel
the way that i do
and every road i take leads me to you
know i can’t disguise
how much that i try
and constantly fail to keep you off my mind
so i’m signing off
this is my last goodbye
‘cause without you here i’m only half alive
only half alive
[verse 3]
i guess that i’m too codependent
and convinced that you’ll leave by the ending
and there’s no way for me to prevent it
so i hold onto every second
by now i just have to accept it
that it’s your choice to make, i’ll respect it
and i know you tell me i’m wrong but it’s only so long
before you stand corrected
i’m too codependent, i finally said it
and over my friends i get way too possessive
i’m spiralling over and over again
‘cause i take the wrong words out of every message
i read it 10 times and that’s just the beginning
‘cause i’ll overthink ’til the day that i’m dead and
still probably after, ‘cause that’s where i’m heading
and anything that i do wrong, can’t forget it
and by now you’d think i’d be used to rejection
but look where that got me, a constant resentment
for myself and not all the people that left
because how could i blame them, i have that effect
so i guess this the only way i can express it
‘cause anything else hasn’t had much success and
i hope you know i truly wish you the best and
if you ever need me i’ll be in attendance
[bridge]
here we go, all alone
take me back, to my home
guess that i, should’ve known
i wasn’t ready for it all
so can we just, make it quick
before i give in to the abyss
‘cause after all, i admit
i’m not something i can fix
[guitar solo: lil angler]
[chorus]
know i’d cross the stars
to get through to you
hold you in my arms ‘cause if you only knew
how much that i feel
the way that i do
and every road i take leads me to you
know i can’t disguise
how much that i try
and constantly fail to keep you off my mind
so i’m signing off
this is my last goodbye
‘cause without you here i’m only half alive
only half alive
[outro]
only half alive
only half alive
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