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matxeus - 11.23.2019 lyrics
part i
[verse 1]
sitting by myself, thinking a lot
of all the time and effort wasted on a girl that forgot
all of the memories and moments that we shared and it’s not
okay for me to move on, but i’m just lost in my thoughts
stand up, got it
can’t think straight and i can’t control my eyelids
tears rollin’ down every time that i’m lying
about the fact i’m over you and now see you me crying
got my head up on your shoulder, no i can’t hold on much longer
‘cause i’m running out of time and all i wanted was some closure
know that this was a mistake because it’s really really over
when i try to walk away i just be losing my composure
and now i sit in the crowd, try and cover my tears
holding all of thе grief, mourning all of those years
‘causе you just can’t see all the things that i hear
and you just can’t see that i can’t go near, you
no more, even though i adore
everything that you do, but now i walked out the door
like you did all those years ago
and all those tears ago, and all those fears ago
you know
you broke my heart when you told me
that i was perfect on paper ‘cause then you showed me
that perfect wasn’t enough because the only
thing that you were looking for was someone who’s controlling
so now i’m done with the old me
i’m done with always being there and consoling you
when you’re just, feeling sad and lonely
‘cause i’m just, done with the phonies
and i’m just done with the fake sh_t, done with the hatred
done with the people that’d told they’d changed and
done with the stories that’ll always stay the same
‘cause n0body every changes when life is so amazing
i tried, to give it all my might
i tried, i tried, but i’m filled with all this strife
i tried, i tried, but i’m running out of time, oh, yeah
it’s a roll of the dice, know
which you imma get today, the best or the worst
always seem to cause me pain, it’s my eternal curse
but i just can’t let go, my heart’s about to burst
and everything i tried, just made it worse
i prayed to god, took a bullet through my heart
i tried way too hard, i cried way too hard, i
one day imma die way too hard and
i tried to make it work, yeah i came with open arms
you know i gave you everything, got nothing to show
you know, don’t come near me ‘cause i can’t take no more
you know, imma be at home, passed out on the floor
you know, don’t call me back ‘cause i’m done with the show
you know i can’t chase you no more
now i tell ‘ya, this is war
don’t you show up at my door, calling me, i hit ignore
finally made it to palm springs, didn’t like what was in store
‘cause they told me this was paradise, but now it’s like a chore
it’s a wasteland, i got days planned
that’s where they stand, and this where me stands
now i got wasted, in a wasteland
it’s a waste and
but i finally decided, this gon’ be the moment when i’m finally retired
from loving you
‘cause even after everything that we been through
turns out, that the one for me wasn’t you
turns out, that the one for me i never knew
turns out, that i finally get to choose
turns out, that i finally paid my dues
turns out, after all this time i finally grew
now you got nothing to say because i’m done with you
finally moved on, and it’s lookin’ like i know the truth
this the life i choose, and this the strife i choose
‘cause this the wife i choose, and b_tch it isn’t you
it’s time i start anew, i walked and then i flew
and now the sky’s the limit, i kinda like the view
i know i’m staying true, to everything i do
there ain’t no time to fake it, ‘cause if i only knew
it’s just a lifelong wait for a hospital stay
it’s a lifelong wait ’til they take you away
it’s a lifelong wait ’til you’re put in a grave
yeah it’s a lifelong wait ’til they forget your name
part ii
[verse 2]
it feel like four, five seconds ago
pulled up to the party and you put on a show
hit it off, got your number and we talked all night
you liked the things that i liked, you made it all seem alright
just like that we cl!cked, we were a perfect fit
you know i couldn’t resist, i ain’t ever felt like this
you were the top of my friend list, top of my ends list
top of the people i would make it to the end with
i started the chase and i, wasn’t concerned with time
couldn’t get you off my mind, don’t need the safer line
locked in the safe i find, promise i pray for love
and you got all my trust, know that you got it all
know that we got it, huh, run and we got it all
slip and i’ll catch your fall
finally found the love, finally found the trust
everywhere we go you leave a trail of angel dust
finally
11 months later, finally say it
everything i been keeping inside, it left me shaking
no time to fake it, this is my making
i’m done with all the chasing, you were mine for the taking
finally made it, this the time that i made it
got a sign that i made it, no more lies that i made it
i was fine in the matrix, but you helped me escape it
now i’m flying and i’m saying, i got no more temptations
i know
i would do anything for you now
i wasn’t perfect but you said you’re happy when i’m around
it was enough for me, and it was enough for you
‘cause it was enough to choose, everything that we do
and i know
that it was finally enough, ‘cause if things ever got rough
it wouldn’t knock me down, ‘cause it can’t fight with our love
and at the end of the day, i still got my throne
you were the queen of my heart, you made me feel at home
[verse 3]
i know we ended strong, it didn’t last for long
so now i channel all my love into a single song
‘cause when it didn’t work out, it was enough for me
you said we’d always be friends, you said you’d never leave
i didn’t give up, no, i didn’t give up, hope
i didn’t give up, so, the only thing i, know
i’ll never break it off, i’m tryna make it up
and now the only thing i care about is keeping us
because we found the love, and we made the trust
and we made enough, to give to everyone
you’re still enough for me, hope i’m enough for you
hope it’s enough to choose, after what we been through
it’s enough to win, it’s enough to lose
it’s enough to live, because my life has you
and i know it’s finally the time to make it
and i finally know that it’s the time to chase it
so i’m not giving up, and i’m not losing trust
you know i choose to love, ‘cause i’m not losing us
‘cause you’re the one for me, i’ve finally decided
i’m the only one who gets to make it right and
i been tryna read your story i want every side and
know from this moment forward we will never be divided
i know that it’s time to go, it’s our time for the show
in my prime and i know, got the number one _oh
everything that was told, ain’t no time, let it go
imma live to tell my story, ‘cause we not getting old
you’re the star so you glow, like the sun solid gold
you’re the princess of the kingdom everywhere that we go
and we made it out the door, it’s amazing to know
i’m amazed with the flow, of the story that we told
only got what we know, and we got each other
i’ll never need another, ‘cause you’re the only lover
i’ll never let you suffer, protect ‘ya ’til the buzzer
‘cause once the games are over, i will have finally won ‘ya
know they control the numbers, and they control the movements
know that they want to control me ‘cause they just keep on pursuing
so this my time to do it, this my time to prove it
prove to everyone who doubted me, i won’t be losing
so f_ck the old story i told, pulling up to the party and we’ll put on a show
got the whole crowd moving like we running the club
and the only bands i’m worried ‘bout are covered in gold
you know
i’m not giving up, they can’t take me away
no matter how hard they try, you know i’m with you to stay
it was a lifelong wait to be locked in your gaze
feels like a lifelong wait ’til i give you this ring
and it’s a lifelong wait ’til we’re choosing their names
it’ll be 50 lifetimes ’til they forget your name
[verse 4]
but i won’t, ‘cause i know, when i’m with you the time slows
every second’s like a year of happiness for my notes
if the clouds are ever raining on us that’s so i grow
‘cause when i’m with you even icarus can’t make me fly low
with the things that i know, and everything that you know
we can write the greatest story that has never been told
and know i’ll never get enough of you, i always want more
there won’t be silence or violence, yeah they won’t ever divide us
and know your beauty is timeless, ‘cause i will always admire
all of the smallest things, like how you close your mouth when you’re smiling
‘cause you’re too insecure, but you’re worth so much more
‘cause every single thing about you is a thing i adore
so you just keep on shining, and imma keep on trying
to force our stars to align and then i just keep on climbing
i’m perfecting my timing, and i’m eternally rhyming
you make it all so exciting, for you i’d break up the sky and
know we would live through the damage, the only ones on the planet
then start a new population, call that sh_t “intergalantic”
for once i don’t need no planning, just need for you to be standing
with me as i look at the sky, and think all i’ve been granted
promise you no more demands and you make me feel so enchanted
i’ll watch for all of the demons, make sure you’re never abandoned
‘cause all these seeds that you planted inside my head have been acting
like i need you more than ever, i don’t think i can stand it
now after all of the plans and, all of the bands and
the misunderstandings, all of the damage
all of these hands and, i promise that
i’ll never ever take you for granted, ay
‘cause you may not be mine but i’m always gonna protect ‘ya
there’s demons lurking everywhere they comin’ with their scepters
they stab you, rip your heart out, and be feedin’ on your sorrow
but for you i would do anything, i’ll live to see tomorrow
you’re the only thing i want and for that, there is no question
always running through my mind, got my heart turned up to 11
when i’m looking in the mirror i see you with my reflection
every time you’re standing next to me you take me up to heaven
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