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lan amore - straightforward كلمات الأغنية

sometimes when i was out on the weekends with my friends i haven’t seen in several years i remember the day i told them we’d be friends forever and that just because we got f-cked up in the same backyard around a bonfire in the suburbs like second nature vagrants taking over every inch of enemy territory
turning school nights into war zones of southern comfort and adrenaline pushed carelessly through the nervous system of a tidal wave
cut short from certain death on a freeway going 12 above reckless endangerment
heaven knows we saw the ceiling with a razor blade smile sewn into a fraction of a second before a curbside turns into a fishtail drinking his own weight in inertia
surfing on cold miller high off something personal
i remember calling home and thinking dinner won’t ever be ready like it used to
ever since curfews turned into urban legend by campfire for single mothers to gossip over where their daughters are at 4 o’clock in the morning
solid face staring blatantly confused by each other’s anecdotes because god i haven’t really seen my kid in ages
and it’s funny because all i do is praise her for being best dressed off public record
lurch forward on porcelain giving everything she’s got to a basin full of stomach fluid stained over her own pale reflection
i find it embarr-ssing
i know they can hear me going under all the way from the kitchen but i do not care
simply because the blood alcohol content of a minor is not about a number on a meter but the distance they are away from home when the puke turns red and it’s been 3 hours since anyone has asked where so and so went
it doesn’t feel like i belong here
i’m a song of 27 whispers hollered over miles of white picket fences and desperation so don’t you tell me sh-t about privilege
because i saw it night after night folded onto a gl-ss table spilling every detail of my love life
reminiscing about some long gone future
watching my best friend lay shallow on his stomach calling for an ambulance
praying to a god i don’t believe in for some sign of clarity like trying to toss a 12 ounce bottle deep into the shadows through the forest into a bucket 26 meters away
that sh-t is impossible
specifically through some turntable full spin disney movie ballroom of ragdoll physics
like, like if i haven’t seen every possible combination of a good chance go royal flush into some deadwood drifting down the river then call me a dead man too
cowboy hat set ablaze soaked in kerosene courage
we are lit
hopeless
hair bent on on some bullsh-t snake oil sacrifice
payed out of pocket indefinitely
lackl-ster understanding of morals though pretty capable of basic communication under pressure
this is one of those times where the current population of your friends list become noticeably indifferent to your self destructive habits
start going off on short riots of justice and equality while i’m still trying to go ten minutes without pushing out an organ through my t–th
it goes without saying that minor surgery and getting your stomach pumped are almost the same thing because in both cases you are mostly unconscious with tubes coming out of your throat the only real difference is that in one case you never asked for someone to save you
i could care less if you think this is a cry for help or some nine to five depression statement cause it ain’t and all i’m really saying is that the next time i show up to a spot i better not see one kid sneaking off to challenge destiny
that sh-t has been manifested since the first step of man so don’t test it bro
for the record i was never there
i hate parties
and now when i see the kids out on sunday nights forcing away their childhood through clear bitter confidence in exchange for a magic marker 5 o’clock shadow
i think about myself
head down full motion through half frozen puddles deeper than plato’s grave
teenagers screaming for help in pitch blackness
all cellphones non responsive
solid ground not an option mom i’m sorry
cause i just want to be home right now
6 years ago

- lan amore

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