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june henry - while we aren’t looking lyrics

i want to go home to a body
that has never memorized this pattern
but i think that bodies like mine
all know it too well to unremember
and our bodies talk to each other
while we aren’t looking

i wish to intercept the quietly passed note
before my throat reads it
and the feeling all comes back

so now i just carry this dead weight
that’s still warm, and the half dollars
keep slipping off its eyelids
and it sees me better
than any living thing ever could
so i meet its mouth with my own
and try to breathe anything back into it
but it just gеts heavier evеry time

i started taking the medicine again
to build my body into something
better suited for being a lone pallbearer
someday i will find a place
to bury this thing for good
and i will dig a hole big enough to fit
this hardened half of me alongside it in the earth
i will not delude myself into thinking
anything will grow atop us
we’ll poison the soil for a square mile
small animals will eat contaminated vegetation
and when their soft bodies are found cold
we can co_opt their funerals
since these quiet parts of us
will never get their own

- june henry

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