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johnée - to the women who raised me كلمات الأغنية

[verse 1]
i don’t want to leave
but i can’t stay here anymore
no one can please my wants and needs, at times i feel unlovable
dancing bare feet on the balcony
waiting for the end of the world
i admire people from a distance, we’re not so different at all

[pre_chorus]
i wish i could see myself
the way other people sees them
but i can’t change the way i’m perceived
i know they think i’m high maintenance
there’s a lot of things one can say about me, but in my defense
i’m not saying i don’t have a bad bone in my body
but i try do the best that i can
[chorus]
to the women who raised me since i was a baby
i’m sorry for all the chaos that i caused
but i know you’re not ’cause you’re the one who taught me how to be
i know i always find a way to blame myself for everything
even though it’s not my fault
i wish i had someone to talk about this
but i don’t need people to tell me what i am and what i’m not
i can figure it all alone

[verse 2]
i know it’s controversial but i want it all to be over
there’s only so much one can put up with
it’s been twenty_one years, six months and fourteen days of being me
i’m wholeheartedly not playing the tortured artist
i thought this was what every person feels
i can hardly put it into words
do i really deserve this pain?
the things i’ve done for love, i know that no one understands
but i like to think that everybody hurts the same
’cause we’ve got blood in our veins

[pre_chorus]
i wish i could see myself
the way other people sees them
i haven’t been eating well, i wish i could tell a friend
there’s a lot of things one can say about me, but in my defense
if i loved my body, i wouldn’t be so caught up in what other people think
[chorus]
to the women who raised me since i was a baby
i’m sorry for all the chaos that i caused
but i know you’re not ’cause you’re the one who taught me how to be
i know i always find a way to blame myself for everything
even though it’s not my fault
i wish i had someone to talk about this
but i don’t need people to tell me what i am and what i’m not
i can figure it all alone

[bridge]
i’m still the same apologetic, but i learned your methods
to not let anyone mess with me
i am overdramatic, bodies buried in the attic
i’m tired of people telling me who to be
i’m lonely and i don’t want this
but i won’t change for anything
maybe one day i’ll find someone as shakespearean as me
until then, i will still hang from the chandelier

[chorus]
to the women who raised me since i was a baby
i’m not sorry for the h_ll i have unleashed
and i know you’re proud ’cause you’re the one who taught me how to be
i know i always find a way to blame myself for everything
but it’s not my fault and at least now i recognize it
i’ll keep rewriting

- johnee

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