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jay foreman - the procrastinator (live at woodstock 2007) lyrics

italics: tim jeffries of , regular text: jay foreman, bold: all of , bold italics: jay foreman and all of “dougsoc”

[preamble]
so… yeah, we were going to do the lion king…
er, but we decided not to
instead we got the wonderful jay foreman!
woo!

perhaps i ought to explain
is this mic on?
first of all, i need a chair. hang on one sec…
ah

tech people?
that’s better
right, perhaps i ought to explain
these guys won the auction, to get, sort of, fifteen minutes on stage
but they didn’t have any ideas
and then they sent mе an email, and they said “could you, sort of, play four songs like you normally do?
“and thеn, we’re gonna be your, sort of, backing singers,” and do… sort of performance art behind me
they’ve got loads of costumes and dances prepared, and i’ve only got a really vague idea of what they’re doing, so, uh…
i’m just gonna detach myself from all sort of responsibility right now
but… i hope we all enjoy it!

what’s the first song?
(the procrastinator!)
this is a song called the procrastinator
[chorus a 1]
i am the procrastinator, make way for me
i will do everything eventually

[verse a 1]
but first i’ll fold my clothes
and pile them up in order so the largest thing is on the floor
and then i’ll take my phone
and get rid of the messages that i don’t need anymore

[prechorus 1]
i’ll make a numbered list of things i have to do
sit long on the toilet even though i don’t need to
build a playing card tower
have a power shower
bite my nails, pick my nails
doing nothing never fails
la laa lala la laa
la laa lalaa
laa laa lala la la
la lala la la la

[chorus a 2]
i am the procrastinator, make way for me
i will do everything eventually
[verse a 2]
but first i’ll go outside
and get a bit of exercise by riding around on my bike
and then i’ll go next door
and spend hours talking to the guy that i don’t even like

[prechorus 2]
i’ll take my posters down and put them up again
go on my computer, log on msn

[bridge 1]
msn? msn?
who said msn?!

[verse b 1]
if you go on msn
a terrible thing will happen to you
you will sit, and stare for hours
and people you don’t like will talk to you

[chorus b 1]
don’t go on msn (don’t go on msn)
don’t go on msn (don’t go on msn)
don’t go on msn (don’t go on msn)
don’t go on msn
[verse b 2]
they say “hi”, you say “hi” back
they say “how are you?”
you say “fine thanks, how are you?”
they say “fine thanks”…
and you’ll do nothing else all afternoon

[chorus b 2]
don’t go on msn (don’t go on msn)
don’t go on msn (don’t go on msn)
don’t go on msn (don’t go on msn)
facebook is even worse

[bridge 2]
facebook? facebook?!
don’t get me started on facebook

[verse b 3]
they say that there’s no cure for facebook
your life is simply at an end
once you’ve cl!cked on ‘view more photos’
of a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend

[chorus b 3]
facebook is even worse (facebook is even worse)
facebook is even worse (facebook is even worse)
facebook is even worse (facebook is even worse)
facebook is even worse

[prechorus 3]
build another tower
have another shower
paint my nails, eat my nails
doing nothing never fails
la laa lala la laa
la laa lalaa
laa laa lala la la
la lala la la la

[chorus a 2]
i am the procrastinator, make way for me
i will do everything eventually
thanks

- jay foreman lyrics

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