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hydral bloom - when you were there lyrics

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in this world there’s an invisible magic circle
there’s an inside
and an outside

what’s enough?
heart on my cuff
wear my emotions on my sleeve
because life called my bluff
what could i become?
comfort in feeling numb
tired of playing dumb
distance myself from where i’m from
no longer an alum

i can’t accept
anything less than perfect
i neglect to reflect
personal growth that i reject
trying to overcorrect
never thought to reconnect
failing to еver interject
wakе me as i overslept

(those people are inside the circle)
isolation is my consolation
(and i’m outside) of the situation
pushing back the desperation
(it doesn’t really matter) in the simulation
loneliness clings to me
once promised to set me free
grant me all my liberties
but now i drown in negativity
emotional volatility
scr_p my responsibilities
goodbye creativity

but who’s to blame?
when all my failures feel the same
hate the reflection i became
hate the caption hate the frame
if i put it all to flames
would there be something to reclaim?
am i a person just in name?
is there a purpose to the pain?

but i know that flame was doused
waiting for some hope to sprout
life in a serotonin drought
is there a way out?
only thing i have is doubts
can’t imagine life without
watching as it all surmounts

i know i’m outside of the norm
i just could never conform
never believed the misinformed
i’m the calm before the storm
i’m the peace before the swarm
i’m the loss that won’t be mourned
the chrysalis that won’t transform
(those people are inside the circle)
isolation is my consolation
(and i’m outside) of the situation
pushing back the desperation
(it doesn’t really matter) in the simulation

i can’t commit
at the first struggle i submit
taking any chance to quit
weaker than i will admit
struggling to just exist
all my letdowns i omit
the opportunities i’ve missed

in this constant conflict
tearing myself apart bit by bit
always contrasting to the script
chewing more than i ever bit
extinguishing more than i ever lit
unsure of what i will depict
from every trauma i imprint

can i repair
the emptiness from when you were there?
hurt more than i was aware
wallowing in the despair
thought that the feeling was shared
but when i start to compare
i bared more than what was fair
isolation is my consolation
and i’m outside of the situation
pushing back the desperation
it doesn’t really matter in the simulation

uhh… no… i… i kinda messed up…
i
hate myself

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