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human error - human error in the kitchen lyrics
[intro: deo de madman, luca bergonzi]
so luca, it’s been great to have you, thanks so much for coming in. thanks to you. final question: what is your secret to a real good pomodoro sauce?
oh well, that’s a really good question, see. so i like to cook the onions at the beginning, then you’ve got to- you’ve got to put in a lot of seasoning, so like salt, pepper, bit of sugar to caramelise the onions. and then i like to add some mixed herbs, especially the ones you get from sainsbury’s, you know, already in the pot. and then, family secret, a nice big pot of dolmio
[verse 1: deo de madman]
introducing human error recipes and dishes
you chose the tortellini with ricotta cheese and spinach
boil these bad boys for two to three minutes
any time longer, and your pasta will taste english
some b-tter and some sage will keep them finger l!ckin’
but don’t you dare serve these f-ckers up with chicken
some p-ssata’s fine, if you like the taste clean
but if you want the ketchup, better stick to your baked beans
or these tortellini will have seen better days
don’t serve them as a dish faker than spaghetti bolognaise
take it from deo and ngma, pasta senseis
don’t eat a pasta dish unless it’s cooked al dente
[chorus 1: deo de madman & ngma, luca bergonzi]
yo, human error’s in the kitchen (so basically, to check if you’re pasta’s ready)
yo, deo de madman’s in the kitchen
yo, it’s ngma in the kitchen (you’ve got to to throw it on the wall, and if it sticks it’s job done)
yo, what you cooking bro?
[verse 2: ngma]
back to the pan again, with plenty of linguine
i’m slapping up a sauce made from gambas and zucchine
i’m in between adding pepper or some parsley
topped with a dash of cream, but make sure to add it sp-rs-ly
stop cooking that carbonara you’re making ‘em scream
italians don’t eat that sh-t with mushroom, bacon and cream
so please, what do you mean? i don’t need baked-a-beans
you ain’t faking this pasta with grated cheddar and greens – nah
how to prevent pomodoro stains antics
is to guillotine spaghetti into lots of little matchsticks
add a dash of seasoning to flavour the whole
once you’ve savoured the meatb-lls you’ll start scr-ping the bowl
now for a shout out to all you tuna pasta bake lovers
putting dairy on fish is a rookie mistake, brothers
explain why in america this happens, please
’cause i’m intrigued by the appearance of your mac and cheese
[chorus 2: deo de madman & ngma, luca bergonzi]
it’s human error in the kitchen (now all these recipes are sounding very tasty, i think i’m going to try a lot of them at home actually, it’s the first time i’ve ever heard of them)
deo de madman’s in the kitchen
we’ve got ngma in the kitchen
’cause everybody’s in the kitchen
you’ve got my parents in the kitchen
all the italians in the kitchen
there’s no british in the kitchen
(oi wait guys, luca’s still in the kitchen, oh listen up, oi see)
[verse 3: luca bergonzi, deo de madman & ngma]
see i spend my time cutting hairs for a living
but today i’m here with human error in the kitchen
we’ve been trying something new for every course
each one can be had with my old nonna’s sauce
bless her soul, she was a master of the condiment
béchamel to mortadella, always got the compliments
anyway, any day with us is a feast
so you’re warmly invited to come over next easter
we’ve got paste cresciute, casatiello, we like make pastiera, mamma makes a great one of those, we’ve got the tasty colomba, fried calzones, salami, salsiccie, whatever you want guys…
(luca, luca we’re out- the studio time’s finished mate, we can pick this up next week man, come on…)
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