headcase - slice of life كلمات الأغنية
[intro]
y’all don’t know how much this music means to me
but i’ll give you an idea
headcase, mr. j on the beat
[headcase]
here’s a little story that must be told
about a kid who spent his whole life being controlled
until he used the power of music to free his soul
now he won’t stop at nothing to reach his goal
this is my tale, one that you’ve probably heard before
but y’all don’t know the extent of my personal war
when you’re traveling dusty rhodes to achieve the ‘american dream
wrestling with shadows ain’t as easy as it seems
when i was young, people kept their distance
i was an outcast, i looked and acted different
they didn’t know what to do with me so they tried to ruin me
by saying everything i said and did was lunacy
that’s why i took on the moniker headcase
i had to prove to everybody that i wasn’t just dead weight
hip-hop helped me get away from life’s inconsistencies
i grabbed a pencil and the rest is history
the lyricist lounge show is what first inspired me
at first, i didn’t take rapping serious entirely
but the more that i wrote, the more my outlook changed
i started rapping publicly when i hit 9th grade
i’ll admit, back then i was faking the funk
and at the end of the year, i sure had taken my lumps
so that summer i decided to get my mind right
get my rhymes tight and forget about the lime light
so i switched it up completely, left behind the gimmicks
even so, i still caught hate from all the critics
saw the battles and the ciphers in the high school lunchroom
i wanted to join, they wouldn’t let me come through
it’s hard to get in the sport of rap
when i asked for the mic, they wouldn’t p-ss it like greedy quarterbacks
though there was some respect that was earned
i finished high school feeling i never got the props i truly deserved
but i kept stepping it up, and my peers kept hating me
i waited patiently for someone to place they faith in me
spock jenkins was the first one to reach out
he actually hit me up before he even heard me freestyle
he put me on his mixtape, but it got even better
when he suggested we do an entire record together
it felt good to finally have someone that i could trust
but he was in the army, that’s how my bubble was bust
he had to go to kuwait for a year and half
its like, two steps forward and three steps back
but when we put our record on hold
i decided i had to make a name for myself on my own
people -ssume i’m selfish ’cause i refuse their help
but they never even gave me the chance to prove myself
i’d get stiffed by promoters who’d never call back
so any chance of exposure i’d have would just fall flat
people called me a joke when there’s nothing to laugh about
the last thing i wanna hear from another rapper’s mouth
the sound of laughter can be haunting when they taunting
i let my anger take control and say the wrong thing
i started a fight more than once or twice
these b-st-rds tried to stereotype ’cause i was white
the fact is, they just tried to front ’cause i’m hot
and they know i don’t try to be something i’m not
i’m not a poser singing the same songs recycled
i’m not a biter standing in the shadows of my idols
i’m trying to forge my own path, create my own sound
i wanna be known outside of my hometown
they asked questions about my career’s progression
i didn’t have the heart to say i lost my direction
it had me stressing, i was bugging in the worst ways
like why’d i even start rapping in the first place?
it left me hollow within, hitting the bottle again
i’m not like these other rappers that are following trends
but when your career sees no movement and remains stagnant
then you’ll understand how my p-ssion became absent
i ain’t trying to earn sympathy points
this ain’t another one of them “i-hate-the-music industry” joints
i was mad they kept shutting the door
so like an earthworm, i went underground and came up through the floor
you’d rather sign to a label and stay stuck on the shelf
cause you’re afraid to take charge and do it all yourself
but not me, i took my chances
funded everything out my own pocket, no record advances
i met supast-tion and he showed me some love
like “keep doing your thing, i know the game is f-cked up”
i didn’t know what would be the outcome
but now i’m putting in work to release my first album
a wise person once said, and it stands as a true fact
you are what you love, and not what loves you back
and i love this form of expression
no nine to five, music is the most important profession
and i show love to everyone who supported
they know i put my heart into everything i’ve recorded
they say music is a reflection of self
so i decided to call the album “self portrait”
when it’s done and released, it should be something to see
will the cats who first hated still be frontin’ on me?
or will i finally catch the ears those cynical critics
and have ’em admitting i can get on a track and rip it
will i sell a lot of records and get paid in full
or will they trash my record and feed me to the wolves?
who’s to say? well that’s where i’m at today
either way, i’ll go ahead and let them b-st-rds hate
it makes me stronger, as hard as a rock
but don’t ask about the future, cause that’s as far as i got
forget anything else you may have heard
cause the only thing for sure about headcase is nothing’s for sure
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