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h. zaich - eminem’s “going through changes” lyrics
[hook]
i’m going through changes
i’m going through changes
[verse 1]
lately i really, feel like i’m rolling for delph like philly
feel like i’m losing control of myself, i sincerely
apologize if all that i sound like is i’m complaining
but life keeps on complicating, and
i’m debating on leaving this world this evening
even my girls can see i’m grieving, i try and hide it but i can’t
why do i act like i’m all high and mighty
when inside, i’m dying, i am finally realizing i need help
i can’t do it by myself, too weak
2 weeks i’ve been having ups and downs
going through peaks and valleys, dilly dallying
around with the idea, of ending the shit right here
i’m hatin my reflection, i walk around the house tryna fight mirrors
i can’t stand what i look like, yeah, i look fat, but what do i care?
i give a f-ck, only thing i fear, is hailie
i’m afraid if i close my eyes i might see her…shit
[hook]
[verse 2]
i lock myself in the bedroom, bathroom, napping at noon
yeah dad’s in a bad mood, he’s always snapping at you
marshall what happened that you, you can’t stop with these pills
and you’ve fallen off with your sk!lls, and your own fans are laughing at you
it become a problem you’re too pussy to tackle, get up
be a man, stand, a real man would’ve had this shit handled
know you just had your heart ripped out and crushed
they say proof just flipped out, homie just whipped out and bust
nah, it ain’t like doody to do that
he wouldn’t f-ckin’ shoot at, no-body, he fights first
but dwelling on it only makes the night worse
now i’m popping vics, percs and methadone pills
“yeah em, tight verse, you k!lled it”
f-cking drug dealers hang around me like yes men
and they gonna do whatever i says when, i says it
it’s in their best interest to protect their investment
and i just lost my f-ckin’ best friend, so f-ck it, i guess then:
[hook]
[verse 3]
my friends can’t understand this new me
that’s understandable man, but think how bananas you’d be
you’d be an animal too
if you were trapped in this fame and caged in it like a zoo
and everybody’s looking at you, what you want me to do?
i’m starting to live like a recluse and the truth is
fame starting to give me an excuse, to be at an all-time low
i sit alone in my home theater, watching the same d-mn dvd
of the first tour, the last tour, he was still alive
and it hurts so i…fast forward, sleeping pills’ll make me feel alright
and if i’m still awake in the middle of the night
i just take a couple more, yeah you’re motherf-ckin’ right
i ain’t slowing down for no one, i am almost homeward bound
almost in a coma, yeah homie c’mon, dole ’em out
“daddy, don’t you die on me; daddy, better hold your ground!”
f-ck, don’t i know the sound of that voice
yeah baby hold me down
[hook]
[verse 4]
wake up in the hospital, full of tubes, but somehow i’m pulling through
swear when i come back i’mma be bulletproof
i’mma do it just for proof, i think i should state a few
facts, cause i may not get a chance again to say the truth
shit it just hit me that what if i would not have made it through
i think about the things i would never got to say to you
i’d never get to make it right, so here’s what i came to do
hailie this one is for you, whitney and alaina too
i still love your mother, that’ll never change
think about her every day, we just could never get it together
hey, wish there was a better way, for me to say it
but i swear on everything, i’d do anything for her on any day
there are just too many things to explain
when it rains guess it pours, yes it does
wish there wasn’t any pain, but i can’t pretend there ain’t
i ain’t placing any blame, i ain’t pointing fingers
heaven knows i’ve never been a saint
i know it just feels like we just pissed away our history
and just today, i looked at your picture, almost hate to say
i miss you sub consciously, wish it didn’t end this way
but i just had to get away, don’t know why
i don’t know what else to say, i guess i’m
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