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gao the arsonist - journal entry 2,919 كلمات أغنية

4:37
eyes flutter open
wince at the harsh blade of light crawling through the chipped corners of the tinted windows
4:41
breakfast
watery oatmeal substitute
juice of some fruit, imported from an off_world colony since there is no flora on idem
4:49
instinctively clutch at left breast pocket for communion vial
f_ck
8 days since i last partook
5:0_ ugh
who the f_ck cares
my entire body’s stiff, preparing for that sickeningly polite knock at the compound gate
f_cking greyshirts
i smile
i greet
i sweat
i shake
their shifting weight coaxes out a squeal from the floorboards and my t__th clench behind my curled lips
motherf_ckers are standing on 8 days worth of manna
f_ck
manna
f_cking brain_death pills
i’m feeling things i didn’t know could be felt
i’m thinking things i know shouldn’t be thought
just how much has he taken from me

all citizens must gather in the tabernacle at the dawn of the eclipsing binary to partic_p_te in the biannual public communion
absence or abstinence is a punishable offense

- gao the arsonist

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