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father focus confucius - the story of my life lyrics
this is the story of my life. i promise not to exaggerate, i promise not to fabricate. ??? ??? let me give it to you real the way it happened. pulling no punches. come and take a walk through my world, let’s go. come and take a look inside the mind of focus, see what i see. yeah, lost world
so i was raised by a lady with a lot on her plate
paps wasn’t there and i felt like the product of hate
she’d be up partying late and i’d be in my room trying to sleep
waking up each time a bottle would break
and all her friends thought it was funny to give me sips of liquor
now people wonder why i’m sick and bitter
but she needed me so i kick it with her
wishing for a different picture, missing out on childhood
around 8 i started drifting quicker
making friends with similar conditions i was getting bigger
paying less attention i was tripping
i was quick to this or learning how to twist a switch
or flip a zip and mag ??
lost little boy but that isn’t even half of it
“what would you do if you knew too. oh what would you do if i told you the story of my life?”
grandma tried her best to help but couldn’t understand me
and there was a division in the family
’cause mom had her demons and i guess that they were tired of helping her up
and then i came along and made it worse
hey yo it hurts but i numbed the pain with various addictions
a heavy cross to bear the boy was carrying it with him
faced the scariest decisions with a steady hand
and i remember when n0body but the therapist would listen
just a kid and still i lived to die preparing for collision
’cause they said the only thing ahead was burial or prison
and i learned from mom how to beat the load was getting high
but i couldn’t understand at why at night she’d sit and cry
that’s what happens when you live a lie
and she knew that she p-ssed it to her precious little b-st-rd
and she loved me so much, but so what
i turned the stereo up and blasted
i was ready for a casket i wasn’t ready to grow up
“what would you do if you knew too. oh what would you do if i told you the story of my life?”
my addictions got worse, mom started to beat hers
but now she’s got cancer, doctors trying to treat her
nathan died, deck died, i attempted suicide
wondering if they found my body tomorrow who would cry
and who am i to make these people miss me when i know i’m leaving
i got a letter, my grandma’s having trouble breathing
i got a warrant, i’m out here on the hustle creeping
i got a gun and i will use it for no f-cking reason
but momma got clean, before she left me she said jesse i believe in you
it only got this heavy so that you could be a stronger man
and when my grandma p-ssed i said d-mn the past
i’m gonna make ’em proud again, i’m ready
now i’m older and i know that i owe it to them to grow
so i had to knock the chip off my shoulder and let it go
i put my soul into my flow and then i pour it in the mic
i’m just telling you the story of my life
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