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evidentlyfresh - hikikomori lyrics
[verse 1]
stuck in a dream, memory is fading
i am frozen in time, this body is not mine
i am toiling in bed
with my hands on my head
and a knife in my hand
and a knife in your head
can’t take anymore, don’t open the door
i’ll just forget, and keep laying in bed
i didn’t mean it
waking from sleep is a terrible thing
but i know i won’t grow
if i choose not to see
that i’m suffering alone
and i cannot atone
for the mess i have made
for this messy blockade
knock on the door, who’s really there?
are you a friend or a foe?
i won’t know if i don’t
open the door
[chorus]
creeping along the hallway
is a nightmare
i’m all too familiar with
keep your eyes open
and maybe you’ll see
what a terrifying place
my mind can be
i’m falling right through
the cracks of
a reality where i can be free
of the guilt and the pleasure
of the torture and satisfaction
where i can do anything
[post chorus]
take my hand and we’ll go through my land
of fun and games, where we all can play
don’t go too deep or too dark
please don’t prod and pry
and maybe i’ll let you keep living
my fantasy
take my word for it
you don’t wanna dive in
the abyss is too much to see
‘cause what lurks underneath
is a secret i can’t keep
don’t make me question reality
let me sleep
[verse 2]
i can’t understand
why you’re holding my hand
when the hand has committed
a sin with a plan
‘cause you don’t understand
that i have reprimanded
the one who had planned it
the one who had seen
all that could be
and all that once was
i couldn’t hold back
and now i pay the price
[chorus]
creeping along the hallway
is a nightmare
i’m all too familiar with
keep your eyes open
and maybe you’ll see
what a terrifying place
my mind can be
i’m falling right through
the cracks of
a reality where i can be free
of the guilt and the pleasure
of the torture and satisfaction
where i can do anything
[bridge]
little by little
the pieces fall into place
pieces by pieces
my mind is engraved
of the night where the world was
filled with song
and yet her voice won’t sing anymore
taking it slowly
and yet it’s too fast
the flower petals are falling at last
i trip down and choke on my own tears
as you stare at me in disbelief
[chorus]
stalking through the grass now
as i drag her now lifeless limbs behind
you could’ve stopped it
how could you have stopped it?
it was my fault but you are
just as well to blame
screaming as you approach me
bringing back all of
those painful memories
i cannot relive this
why can’t i remain
in my peaceful bliss
until my dying days
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