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epiph@ny - cold as ice كلمات الأغنية

i remember when it was you and i
had each others backs unless it came to an ice-cream fight
had sleepovers almost every night
playing chess the first thing you lost was always your knight
always willing to let others in to our group, always kind
until it came to that fateful night
you got the news your mom was gonna die

you told me and together we went to hide
ourselves in the closet and screamed inside
the pain you felt washed over me it just wasn’t right
she battled for months with the chemo
you stood strong like a quietly suffering hero
then when her chances were down to zero
you hugged me, i hugged her
and you moved to guadalajara a week later

always strong
you let me know you were happy with who i was
inside
i didn’t have to hide
the perfect friend, you could almost read my mind
i always talked
you almost never did
but whenever the conversation balked
you were there, keeping it up with a quiet grin
we would dream of imaginary places we would go as friends
never thought it would be over till the end

we wrote stories for our made up lands
giving them imaginary kings with good hands
evil viziers with evil plans
perfect princes with perfect tans

i went to visit you 4 months later
your mom was still alive
most of her body paralyzed
as the tumor slowly k!lled her body and mind
i went to visit you 4 months later
your pain felt like an enormous crater
i left a week after
to your mom said see you later
but i never saw her or you again
getting the text “she’s dead”
“why did nothing happen? she should have been saved by the meds!”

why is it that the best friends
i always lose
my life like a never ending noose
like my chase after happiness
is like a chase after the
proverbial goose
i have nothing to win
all to loose
and i’m now scared of friendship
that’s the truth

a sword fight
wrestle night
was how we divided our time
siege blights
masks and pretend tights
always doing the same thing — like reading the other’s mind
we would imagine ourself mountain explorers
always willing to keep up the climb
but when our dreams dispersed we would always find
that a cup of cocoa made everything fine

i miss you
you never minded if i jokingly dissed you
always wondering to each other
“how does it feel to have a girl kiss you?”
we never went fishing in real life
but whenever i caught a fish in minecraft you got two
you were always by my side, always my dude
i would rather be attacked by a dog again rather to lose you
rather than to lose you

you left me cold as ice
i don’t know what to do
friendship always comes at a price
who am i now
who?
i feel like i wear a mask
no matter where i go
our time on earth goes by so fast
who am i now i don’t know
you left me cold as ice
i don’t know what to do
friendship always comes at a price
who am i now
who?
i feel like i wear a mask
no matter where i go
our time on earth goes by so fast
who am i now i don’t know

i met you when our mom’s decided
our friendship would be great
you showed up at my house in a bathrobe and i thought
“mom, you have a match made”
you taught me not to be ashamed
of loving elves, hobbits and armour of mithril grade
to laugh when i was unjustly blamed
h-ll, i probably could’ve made it to the patience hall of fame
reminded me every day
that who i am didn’t depend on my name
that we do good things for others because it’s good
not for gain
told me that no matter what bad we do it doesn’t have to stain
but now you’re gone from my life
sticking my heart like a knife
and my feelings are the one thing in this world i can’t fight
you left
now it’s just a not-so-happy me, myself and i
you left me
cold as ice

- epiphny

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