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combofun scripts - episode 6: aiden's anger management كلمات أغنية

lights… camera… action!!!

(it all starts off in ‘learn to be smart school’, tunner (the teacher) walks in, and is not looking happy)

tunner: alright class, i am so mad! i am so angry because one of you kids cr_pped in the sink in the bathroom! so when i went to wash my hands, i got p__p all over my hands! so, i wanna know which one of you did it! _throws the desktop globe in anger_

aiden: _whispers to sky_ it was me.. i did it

_aiden & sky both laugh quietly_

tunner: so, no one’s gonna fess up to it, huh? hmm, alright that means the whole class is gonna get punished! so you guys are gonna have to write sentences

sky: write sentences?

aiden: i know a sentence to write, deez nuts!

_sky & aiden start laughing_

tunner: silence! alright class, since no one wants to admit to taking a cr_p in the sink, all of you are gonna have to write: “i will not p__p in the sink”, 100 times! so pull out your pencil & paper, and get to writing!

sky: 100 times?!

aiden: hey, sky. look what i drew: _pulls out a paper of tunner saying: who dookied in sink!?_
_sky & aiden laugh quietly_

raddy: tunner!! aiden drew a picture of you!

aiden: raddy shut up, it’s a joke!

tunner: jesus christ, guys. i can’t enjoy my hot dogs & ramen noodles without you interrupting me! aiden, let me see the picture. _sn_tches the picture_ what do we have here?

_tunner reads and laughs a little_

tunner: very funny, aiden. that’s exactly what i said earlier when i was mad! hahahaha! …anyways, aiden. since you decided you wanna be a comedian today, you now have to write 200 times instead of 100! that is your homework!

aiden: what?

raddy: _laughs_ good luck writing all those sentences!

aiden: _angry_ grrr… _walks out the door_

raddy: look at him run away like a baby!

aiden: _walks back in with boxing gloves_ ding ding ding!

raddy: are those boxing gloves?

aiden: nighty night! _punches raddy_
tunner: _sighs_ i am so tired of all this screaming.. aiden, go to the princ_p_l’s office, please..

_30 minutes later_

velvette: what’s wrong, valentino?

valentino: i have this weird feeling that aiden did something bad

_jax walks in here with aiden_

jax: in this corner, recently suspended from school, assault charges pending, weighing in at 120 pounds, aiden the bully slayer!!

aiden: ding ding ding! _punches a box with a face on it and kicks it_

jax: and we have a winner!!

aiden: wooooo!!!

jax: great job, kiddo. you’re an animal! _gives him handshake_ that’s my boy right there!

valentino: what’s going on, officer?

jax: your kid beat the cr_p out of another kid at school

valentino: aiden, why did you do that?
aiden: because he was making me mad

valentino: what’s going to happen, officer?

jax: well now he’s getting suspended for 10 days

aiden: yes, that’s what i’m talking about, papa

jax: yeah, or he can take anger management classes

valentino: well, he definitely needs anger management classes

aiden: _angry_ i don’t need anger management classes!!! _throws a toy in anger_

jax: well, clearly you do

velvette: well, who’s going to teach him anger management?

jax: well that would be me

valentino: well, he needs anger management so do whatever you have to do, alright?

jax: ok. _30 minutes later, jax changes in his doctor clothes_ hey, did somebody call a doctor?

valentino: umm… yes?

_aiden plays with his mini piano_

valentino: aiden, stop playing with your mini piano, the doctors here

jax: hey there, aiden. it’s nice to finally meet you!

_aiden still plays with the mini piano_

valentino: aiden, stop it!

_aiden hisses like an angry cat since he’s angry_

jax: ok, aiden. we’re gonna try some anger management exercises, okay? the first thing we’re gonna do is take deep breaths, it’s a classic. do it like me! _breaths in and out 3 times_ try that

aiden: _breathes in_ oooohhh yeahhhhh!!!

jax: w_ what?

aiden: _breathes in_ america, h_ll yeaaahhhhhh!!!!!

valentino: aiden, stop it!

aiden: _breathes in_ burgers and shotguns!!!!!!!

jax: ok, nevermind. we’re not gonna do breathing exercises. instead, whenever you get mad, try counting to 10 until you calm down. …but how am i gonna make you mad again? oh i know! _takes away the mini piano_

aiden: hey, that’s my mini piano!

jax: oh, this thing? that’s stupid, i mean… make up your mind, is it mini or is it a piano? what does this do? _presses key_ oh, so predictable, it makes a sound. it’s so dumb, people who like this are dumb

aiden: _angry_ grrrrrrrr

jax: perfect, now count to 10!

aiden: one… two… three… four… ugh what comes after four!?!?!?!

jax: i’m not gonna tell you what comes after four, what are you stupid?

aiden: _screams in anger, and punches holes in walls_

jax: ok ok, chill! i guess that didn’t work.. i have another plan, do you have any balloons?

valentino: yeah, it’s in the party cabinet

jax: ok

_10 minutes later, jax brings in the balloons_

jax: alright, aiden. this one is called the balloon exercise. do you have the sharp tack that i gave you?

aiden: yep, right here

jax: good! now what we’re gonna do, we’re gonna pretend this balloon is a person, and he’s gonna insult you. what i need you to do is hold back your anger and try not to pop the balloon. if you pop it, you fail. ok?

aiden: got it

jax: ok, here we go. _shakes the balloon a little to make it look like it’s talking_ oh, aiden. you’re so stupid and ugly, i’m glad i don’t like you, which you’re stupid and ugly!

aiden: _gets mad and pops the balloon in anger_

jax: oh, see aiden? that’s bad, you’re not supposed to pop the balloon

valentino: kiddo, you’re not supposed to pop the balloon

aiden: oh ok

jax: _brings out another balloon which has shrek on it. jax does a shrek impression_ oh, aiden! get out of my swamp! you’re too stupid to be in my swamp. bleh!

aiden: _gets mad and pops the balloon in anger_

jax: that’s a bad boy, you’re not supposed to pop shrek. _grabs another balloon and has sh_ggy from scooby doo on it_

valentino: aiden, hold your anger back

aiden: i’m trying!

jax: _holding the sh_ggy balloon, and making the impression_ zoinks, scoob! it’s aiden. don’t give him any scooby snacks, he’s ugly!

aiden: _gets mad and pops the balloon in anger_

jax: no. you’re a bad boy, aiden. you’re not supposed to do that. _grabs another balloon, it has the terminator on it_

jax: _holding the balloon while making a terminator impression_ oh, jeffy! it’s me, the terminator. you is so stupid, put that cookie down now!

aiden: _gets mad and pops the balloon in anger_

jax: nope, not quite. _grabs another balloon_

valentino: aiden, you’re failing

jax: _holds the balloon with plankton on it, and does the impression_ ravioli, ravioli, give me the formuoli!

aiden: oh, i actually like plankton

jax: there you go, buddy. that’s great! we’re making progress!

valentino: but he popped 4 balloons though

jax: yeah but he didn’t pop plankton, so he’s doing good. follow me!

_jax & aiden are in the combofun game room_

jax: alright, aiden. this is the sore loser exercise. so, for this exercise, i’m gonna beat the cr_p out of you in air hockey, and you have to try to not get mad like a little baby. which is gonna be hard cause you’re about to get owned by me in air hockey! i’m one of the best popular air hockey players, you’re gonna be like “how are you so good at air hockey?”, and i’ll be like “i don’t know, it’s a natural gift that i have.” alright, so turn it on!

aiden: alright. _puts a quarter in there so we can play the game_

jax: alright, let’s go!

_they play and aiden wins the first one_

jax: oh, alright. imma let you have that one. _brings the puck out again_ alright, prepare for a slaughtering! here we go!

_aiden wins again_

jax: alright, i’d like a good comeback story. _brings the puck out again_ you’re not getting another point!

_aiden wins again_

jax: _brings the puck out again_ alright, i know you think you’re good but you’re not. i’ll let you do that so you’ll be more mad when i win

_aiden wins again_

jax: alright, alright. you’re kinda starting to tick me off a little bit, but that’s fine. _brings the puck out again_ alright, get ready! you’re getting rekt!

_aiden wins again_

jax: _brings the puck out again_ alright, i was playing around but now i ain’t playin’. i’ll let you get a five point lead, because that’s what you’re gonna need if you ever wanna beat me. i’m not playing around, this is for real okay?

_aiden wins again_
jax: _brings the puck out again_ alright, hahaha very funny. you have a 6 point lead now. i know, the first to seven wins. ok, but i know don’t worry. i’m gonna make a comeback! it’s fine, i’m gonna win, watch this! i can see you getting mad over there, i see the fury in your eyes. but don’t worry, i’m not mad. i’m cool, cool as a cucumber. ok? get ready to be mad cause i’m gonna win

_aiden wins the last time, and gets a 7 point win at air hockey_

jax: oh, that is it! oh no no. _jax beats aiden up_

valentino: woah woah, get off him!

jax: but he cheated

valentino: how?

jax: he probably put b_tter on the puck or something, i don’t know

valentino: you know, maybe you need anger management

jax: no, it’s fine. let’s do another exercise

_10 minutes later_

jax: ok, aiden. this is pet therapy. _gives aiden a cam the cat squishmallow_

aiden: cool, a kitty!

jax: yep, whenever you get mad, you just pet this cat like this. _puts hand on cat squishmallow and rubs it_ y’know? like me whenever i lose at air hockey! you know how that makes me mad. cause i was playing against a little chump, and i lost to him, even though he doesn’t know what he’s doing, _gets a little mad again_ and he probably cheated, and that’s why he probably won in the first place, which is ridiculous because i’m a champion at the game!!! _throws the cam the cat squishmallow_

aiden: no, the kitty!

valentino: you threw it, why?

jax: sorry… l_ let’s just try something else

valentino: ok

_jax brings out dollar bills_

jax: now we’re gonna try money therapy, which is what i do and all the other things i try don’t work, so i just try to bribe the person to stop being mad so i can go home

aiden: ok

jax: so, i’m gonna sit here and insult you, and every time i insult you, you don’t get mad. i’ll give you a dollar, how does that sound?

aiden: sounds good to me!

jax: alright. _picks up a dollar bill_ the other day, someone asked me if you’re a boy or a girl and i said ugly…