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college humor - wish i had a portal gun lyrics
wish i had a portal
wish i wish i had a portal gun
wish i had a portal
wish i wish i had a portal gun
to be an aperture science client
would be like a dream
hey yo my brain has been cravin’ it back
since portal hit steam
no commute to work i’d have
the portal express
with a blue one in my closet
orange one at my desk
when my roommate is annoying and been
toying with my stuff
i’d shoot a portal underneath him and just
punch him in the nuts
i’d order delivery get it
fast like digiorno
‘cuz once it leaves the restaurant
it goes right through a portal
i’m never late for a date
just ask my lady friends
by using portal physics
i’m always impressing them
forget making reservations
i would never have to wait
portal in the right location
i’ve got someone else’s plate
i could sneak into a party
where they didn’t invite me
and be dealing out bacardi
while some dudes try to fight me
would always end well
dealing with these mere mortals
aperture handhelds
got me thinkin’ with portals
wish i had a portal
wish i wish i had a portal gun
i’m not mute like freeman yo
but please don’t make me beg for one
wish i had a portal
wish i wish i had a portal gun
i’d be cool as ch-ll
oh i could do a speedy grocery run
life gave me lemons
i don’t make lemonade
i’m mad like cave johnson
i got lemon grenades
the world is filled with puzzles
i could solve with portal physics
i would brave the chamber struggles
just to escape family visits
i’d be traveling like a maveric
surfaces all orange and blue
when i’m locked out my apartment
i’d use the companion cube
oh glados take me to your center
‘cuz i want to get enriched
i’m dying thinkin’bout your science
i’d do anything for it
yeah, i’d shoot two portals in a vertical line
undo my belt, lean in and
change pants without having to look down
also i’d suck my own diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick
yeah b-tches science now your c-mming through portals
wish i had a portal
wish i wish i had a portal gun
wish i had a portal
wish i wish i had a portal gun
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