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chxnge - killing thoughts lyrics
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[verse 1]
saw her in my dream
she done see the best me
while i balance on this beam
part of me is like that
and that makes me wanna scream
i’m not bout the f-cking cream
but it helps me blow off steam
but it helps to suppress me
will i take you back?
i doubt it
we got way too many conflicts
i got way too many problems
need a b-tch that will fit in my pocket
but not in the right one with my wallet
dopamine telling me she flawless
thank god i can keep it quiet
when i’m not lying down unconscious
[bridge]
i said
i want her back
but i ain’t say it
my subconscious did
i could blame it on that
took all the blame
man f-ck that
launched into combat
i don’t know if it’ll come back
[hook]
caz i’m
haunted by what i could’ve been
i get stuck holding onto whims
think about all the things i missed
why i did all the things i did
don’t know to which side i should give in
i been living too long in the mid
losing myself to the wind
blurring up the man beneath the skin
daunted by all my f-cking sins
bottled up sin just like some gin
i watch my moves caz the room spins
hold my emotions so they can’t pin
too paranoid to let out a grin
i got drive but i hide my vin
keep sh-t away from even my kins
this is how i need to live
[interlude]
this is how i need to live
this is how i need to live
this is how i need to live
this not how i’m supposed to live
[verse 2]
lotta secrets
and they do too
and i’m paranoid
but i put my sh-t up on youtube
so i’m vulnerable
get exposed there
but let’s talk about
the parts of me with no fresh air
never let em out i wish i can
talk like it’s a drought i’m spitting sand
dry inside my mouth
won’t understand
but i understand that my ships are jammed
unmanned by my crew
only got a few
caz it’s hard to connect
when you reject polarities of you
of me
of me
[bridge 2]
i shouldn’t be living my life like this
i shouldn’t be living my life like this
i shouldn’t be living my life like this
i shouldn’t be living my life like this
[hook]
caz i’m
haunted by what i could’ve been
i get stuck holding onto whims
think about all the things i missed
why i did all the things i did
don’t know to which side i should give in
i been living too long in the mid
losing myself to the wind
blurring up the man beneath the skin
daunted by all my f-cking sins
bottled up sin just like some gin
i watch my moves caz the room spins
hold my emotions so they can’t pin
too paranoid to let out a grin
i got drive but i hide my vin
keep sh-t away from even my kins
this is how i need to live
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