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​breathingtechniques - ​the thought of getting any older terrifies me lyrics

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[spoken word]
what have i been doing? everything is different and everything is always changing, but i’m still stuck here
i was insecure and i thought i didn’t deserve her, so i guess i just pushed her away until she left, and i’m really sorry for that
i think i should be alone, maybe forever, i don’t know, but [?] and i don’t want to be hurt either, especially [?], i should i probably give up, right? i should let go, i mean—

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