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big melancholy & btd spectre - rather be dead lyrics

[verse 1: btd spectre]
i look in head, i need an answer, always fight the feeling
i need some sp_ce, i smoke this weed, surpass these thoughts, appealing
this death i think about myself while peelin’ skin from bones
won’t get the phone not headed home, these hoes so pr_ne for love, alone, i
rest with my piece, no peace, these demons in my head still screamin’
sucker want my time, but i’m left on read every time, so f_ck your feelings
always in my hеad, know i’m better off dead
with thеse meds in head, i’m spinnin’, need bread
these b_tches want love, f_ck ’em leave ’em on read
with these words in head, out of bed, i
write with the lead from my pen, no lead in my head, though rather be dead
better things high off a dose to wreck
manifest my luck though, livin’ a mess
f_ck it, dead alive, i will own the night
darkness in my sight, heaven not arrived
god in spite of life, quiet now forever leadin’
nothin’ always bluffin’, f_ck it, wanna die

[verse 2: big melancholy]
yeah, yeah, f_ck it, wanna die
i don’t know why, i try
can’t feel anything other than this pain inside my mind
wanna give up and quit
i can’t stand my pride, when i’m down on my luck, wanna just go and hide
when the voices in my head just won’t be quiet
i been feelin’ like sh_t, it ain’t no need to try and lie, like
ayy, ayy, do you remember on that day when i looked you in the face?
told you, “i ain’t feel the same,” and then turned and walked away
yeah, yeah, you ain’t know what you say, i was feelin’ really brave
started playin’ in my grave and suffocatin’ from the weight
i ain’t have no one to catch me when i started fallin’ all the way from grace
i’m ashamed of the games, like f_ck
maybe i’ll just give it up
throw it all away for a little bit of fun
just so i can feel alive one more time when i’m numb
and i’m feelin’ too alone when you call
so i don’t got the time out my day
just to pick up my phone ’cause it’s off while i’m poppin’ things to help me k!ll off some the pain
and i don’t want to talk ’cause i can’t let you see me be this way
i know you really hate it when i’m f_cked up but i’m f_cked up every day
maybe i’ll just give it up
throw it all away for a little bit of love
just so i could feel alive without taking all these drugs
when i’m feelin’ too alone and you call
so i’ll go make the time out my day just to pick up my phone
when it’s off ’cause i’m poppin’ things to help me k!ll off some the pain
and i don’t want to talk ’cause i can’t let you see me be this way
i know you really hate it when i’m f_cked up but i’m f_cked up everyday
now, love, f_ck

- big melancholy btd spectre lyrics

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