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bart baker - wildest dreams (parody) lyrics
[taylor swift:]
my ex-boyfriends all hate me now
they think i was crazy and d-cked them around
i can’t stand that they think about me as a bad girlfriend
so i guess i gotta take them out!
how dare they all dump taylor swift
and not remember me as perfect
they must pay the price
and i won’t rest until they all are dead!
hey john! remember me?
[john mayer:]
sure, taylor, we dated before i met katy
[taylor swift:]
since our breakup made me scream
i’ll return the favor
go to h-ll, john mayer!
that’s right, scream
[john mayer:]
aaaaah! aaaaah!
[taylor swift:]
rest in peace
ha ha ha!
i invited joe jonas to my tent
yeah, i used to date him
back when he still had hits
[joe jonas:]
it’s not fair my career’s gone to shit
god, i hate my brother
[taylor swift:]
well he’s the one with talent!
[joe jonas:]
why would you say something so cruel?
no, please stop!
what the h-ll did i do?
[taylor swift:]
you broke up with me over the phone
and left me all alone
now i am on a plane
soon i will be k!llin’
one more ex – jake gyllenhaal
[jake gyllenhaal:]
what are you doing, tay?
[taylor swift:]
i’m hitting this b-tton
now i’m gonna jump
it’s my wildest dream
[jake gyllenhaal:]
no! no! no!
[taylor swift:]
that was three
two to go
[harry styles:]
taylor?
[taylor swift:]
h-llo, harry
i’ve come to say bye-bye
because you’re about to die
[harry styles:]
what?
i’m just going to space!
[taylor swift:]
there’s been a change of plans
cause i’m k!lling exes in
my wildest dreams
ha! ha! ha!
[calvin harris:]
what are you doing, taylor, love?
[taylor swift:]
i know eventually you will dump me
[calvin harris:]
what? no! ow!
[taylor swift:]
so i might as well
k!ll you now
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