audiobooks - beefy danny كلمات الأغنية
timid kit got his apple pie stolen in maccadeez every time his mother wasn’t looking. this would usually happen when she went to top up her mascara in the mirror which she found in the toilet. on this particular occasion, big heady beefy danny has timed his sn-tch so well he had run out before kit had noticed
dan’s body was now heavily fueled with excitement. his legs moved fast, automatically, at the speed of lightning. dan had now reached the top of tottenham court road where he spat phlegm onto a pretty woman’s shoe. he then swore a few times and screamed the lyrics “where is my mind?” by the pixies. pedestrians walking by were somewhat confused, but enjoyed the enthusiasm caused by his feet kicking cans at policemen, who were grabbing him by his y-fronts, that were now sinking between the cracks of his b-ttocks
the policemen were feeling gracious because they had all coincidentally f-cked women they fancied for free ten minutes prior to witnessing danny. in their kindness, they took him down the road into troy 22, where he could dj his favourite songs
little did the police know, timid kit was inside there watching his forty-five year old mother dance to dancing queen, who was now screaming the words “young and sweet, only seventeen.” dan, who stank of b.o, chucked his bag onto the chair and boogied his face into a happy fat woman’s cleavage. kit, having had two pints of heineken, realised dan had entered the room, so he pulled out his middle finger and aimed it at him. dan didn’t notice at all because he was busy staring at t-ts. kit’s mother, however, saw his middle finger shoot up and immediately grabbed him by the ear and took him outside to get an explanation
kit thought her reaction was rather unfair, so he told her to go and mother somebody else. she removed her mask and wig and said:
“listen, buddy. i’m not your mother. i am your wife”
(i am your wife)
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