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ashford - first lyrics
[verse 1]
it’s been awhile
since you made up your mind
and i knew this day would come
kept it from conversation
i tried
selfish as it was
and i hate
the fact that i’m obsessed
it only makes me feel worse
and it hurt
the frustration and the stress
of wanting to be first
[chorus]
well i know that i’m not special
but i wanted to feel so
but selfishness consumed me
and i couldn’t let you go
i held you like a captive
until the deed was done
but all i wanted was to be
the first and only one
[verse 2]
time’s been passing
you’ve been waiting so long
for my frantic needs to be met
impatience grows
you know my actions are wrong
but i haven’t let go yet
when we speak of it
our words are cold like ice
and talking is hard to do
hesitation
has always been my vice
patience, your virtue
[chorus]
well i know that i’m not special
but i wanted to feel so
but selfishness consumed me
and i couldn’t let you go
i held you like a captive
until the deed was done
but all i wanted was to be
the first and only one
[bridge]
now we’re here
after all this time has passed
the wait will end this time
thought from then on
i’d let you free and relax
but i’m still unsatisfied
cause when i thought that it was over
a foolish danger attacked
and i had no way to defend
and arrogance
didn’t pay me back
cause being first meant nothing in the end
[chorus]
well i know that i’m not special
but i wanted to feel so
but selfishness consumed me
and i couldn’t let you go
i held you like a captive
until the deed was done
but all i wanted was to be
the first and only one
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