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arthur ray - book of rhymes [c. 2010-2014] lyrics
[verse: college smart]
i am all out of adderall
no sleep, no caffeine or alcohol
this is me… in my realest form
no front and no filter
no one around i should conceal for
so pardon me if i come off a little brash
i ain’t trying to kiss ya -ss
like how i do at work
behind a counter with a drawn up smile and fake laugh
while inside i feel like dying
i’m trying to find a grasp
and nah, my life ain’t bad
but i aspire for perfection
therefore, i’ll never be a winner
doubters see me and sweat now
‘cause i’m gettin’ hotter than the summer
and i’m as cold as the winter, b-tch
[verse: college smart]
i’m so sick a, gold diggas
thirsty b-tches
all of these liars, and fake k!llas
showing up at shows
for spittas i flow sicka than
i can’t sing, but i can rap slow
got a good job, but got no cash flow
say you hate me, you just an -sshole
i can’t hate you, i can act though
i ain’t no poster child
i ain’t no role model
somebody tell this officer
i don’t want no problems
8am backup alarm clock was ringing
the first one i snoozed while sleeping
that’s why i been speeding
[verse: college smart]
honestly, i’m self-conscious and nervous around these b-tches
same reason i drink, and end up behind these fences
and $500 for bail for driving while suspended
body of a man and a brain like dennis the menace and
doctors and practitioners pushing to get these pills swallowed
prodding me with questions; examining all my pill bottles
bring me in to p-ss in a cup cause i’ll pay the copay
then treat me like a drug pusher, wish it all would go away
[verse: college smart]
i get the crowd going, all they hands up like the dow’s open
all i smell is sweat, spit, liquor and white owl smoke
rappers ‘fore me left the building, the don’t wanna watch my show
they don’t wanna see the difference ‘tween us like a chronic quote
they ain’t goin’ nowhere, lonely island, and i’m on a boat
goin’ deep, blue sea, these sharks surround me like a moat
‘cause i got that fire in my blood, it’s running through me
in these cold blooded waters, ll couldn’t cool me
i, get my bread and b-tter sellin’ cells on the routine
and my iphone 4 makes sure my schedule never too free
other rappers having’ money trouble yeah, i got an app
my f-ckin’ day job could pay your bills, i ain’t gotta rap
but i do it, cause my family tree is rooted from the sewers
grew up on chef boyardee and now i’m craving kobe skewers
if you on the team, then keep your spot, don’t be stupid
cause i’ll trade ya -ss for nil like the sox, boy, i’m ruth-less
[verse: college smart]
first thing’s first, gotta get a pen and paper
start jotting’ everything you’re thinking’, rhyme and be creative
now take them lines, spit ‘em out, all them feelings, get em out
and flow it well to a beat before your lungs start fizzing out
and if you still alive and conscious, put that cd in your pocket
bring it to your closest friends, believe when they say you’re the hottest
ha… and get an ego, you’re your biggest fan
put your rhymes up on the net and spread it like a pizza pan
large order, stack your cheese, large as a new yorker
empire state of mind, turn an apple to an orchard
rock the nation, takeover, no hiatus, break’s over
don’t be mad when they don’t want you, ‘less you talkin’ baking soda
[verse: college smart]
sitting in this club looking round at all these dap givers
wondering how many of em really have my back if it
put them in an awkward spot, bet they take it back
that’s why i ain’t buying when talking all that jazz
every show i do, i see a dozen acts
and i ain’t talking rappers, dawg, i’m saying actors
trying to get in on my grind, i call em caspers
see right through ‘em, but i amuse them with my chatter
i got thing for looking fly and spiting women
made a name off of fighting my ex’s and i been winnin’
rappers say they murder me but still got no witness
i’m a young tony, talking will get you on top my hit list
the game ain’t moving because the labels afraid to fix it
i flow like a laxative, leaving these punks sh-t-less
haters allergic, they see me, they eyes itching
need visine just to see what the f-ck they missing
[verse: college smart]
while fake rappers getting the chains on they chest tooken
and of all of these white rappers, i’m prolly the best looking
i probably got a chance, i promise i’m gon prove it
i hanging this on a prayer, if i don’t then i’m gon lose it
and i don’t wanna lose it
my book of rhymes
[verse: college smart]
devil in a new dress, saving up for new br–sts
looking like an angel but where the h-ll you get that new dress?
please, no, not him, anybody but that mothaf-cker
saying the same sh-t to you said to him just last night
details of the nights you spent while i was gone
why the h-ll didn’t you delete them from your phone?
i didn’t need to see that, i almost wish you hid it
why couldn’t you be honest? you said you were gonna
but the fact is you didn’t, so i’m sweating when you’re missing
you told me it was nothing, now i question if you meant it
and i am man enough to take my half of the blame
i’ve made mistakes i’ll have to take to the grave
but at this point, i just need somebody who ain’t you
i can’t tell you that i love you, cause i hate you
i’m a f-cking liar baby, i’m just being honest
[verse: college smart]
i’m sorry doll if you don’t get this, i need to rid this
feeling i been feeling, i just need a minute
inferno burning in my brain and i just need the exit
where in h-ll is god at, i just need a witness
i just need somebody else to see how hard i’ve tried
each mistake i make is like a homicide, it k!lls you
and in turn k!lls me, we stuck in purgatory and i
always feel like i ain’t done enough to win your glory
but i have yet to falter, look back at our story
our relationship has altered, something out of maury
but this sh-t isn’t tv, and although i never thought that it’d be easy
i felt like we would find a way to see these
issues through, and now i’m on the fence like mr. wilson do
we need home improvement, i know i’ma end up missing you
and you’ll be missing me, i hope you feel the same, boo
but i look into your eyes and know i ain’t gon’ change you
[verse: college smart]
my friends ask what’s been going on, they don’t understand us
and this sh-t ain’t they business so, i don’t give em answers
cause i don’t think i have to
nah, d-mn, right… i ain’t never had to
[verse: college smart]
i tell you that i love ya, you look me in my eyes and
i can hear it but i don’t get the vibe from ya
it’s getting cold out, i feel the wind chill
blowing through this old house, summer life is sold out
how we go about, living life like we mean it?
like everything we say is made of reason?
and trust takes precedent over jealousy and treason?
i’m a man of my word, so when i tell ya
i been going crazy cause i want you, i mean it
and when i tell you that i do this all for you, believe it
but when the sunshine goes and the storm cloud snows
i’ll be back to working on us like this song i wrote
my book of rhymes
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