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andynohoes - devilish thoughts lyrics
[verse:1]
devilish thoughts is just fillin’ my mind
sit in my room and i just don’t know why
got the demons beside and they feedin’ me lies
contemplating ’bout just endin my life
to take it or not i do not deserve this
they makin’ me certain that shit is not worth it
what is my purpose i’m tired of searchin’
i’m losing my mind keep on feelin deserted
my outlook on life is the worst
i’m blessed with a blessing
my blessing is also my curse
don’t understand why i can’t find my roots
‘cuz i definitely came up straight from the dirt
beat myself up over shit that i do not control
willing to sell my own soul
for riches and fame
for b-tches and money
f-ck facing a problem id rather be runnin’
hoping this weed is so loud
that it’s muting the voices inside of my head
living for nothin the reason i’d rather be dead
and the reason the noose is surrounding my neck
my self esteem low to the ground so
i put on a mask its a shame
don’t be surprised when you in my position
and feelin’ the same and you askin for help
with a gun to your brain
i’m disturbed sick in the mental
but down with the sickness
resisting on grabbing the metal
pathetic i’m hoping my hope is replenished
a menace like denis
it never feels pleasant the feeling of being rejected
i’m fearin the fear of not being accepted
neglection is worst when it’s in your reflection
it’s nothing a session could fix and i call it depression
rather just hide in my shell
this shit ain’t good for my health
my happiness rises from constantly thinking
of thoughts of erasin myself
id rather be dead i wish this was hell
i’d rather be scorching in flames
i’d rather be forced to be tortured
with pitchforks and turned into corpses
and mortified in fourty-four different ways
look at me now i’m dead
lookin at all of the blood on my bed
look at the outcome of negative thoughts
and i’m hanging i’m dangling right from neck
this is what you do not want
this is the reason i hate me a lot
this the result of just losin connection
with all your surroundings
and this the result of them devilish thoughts
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